Earlier this morning, I shared, “STAY FOCUSED!” Honestly, it was like as soon as I had accomplished something that I felt really great about, I began seeing posts of how it could have been better. From there it just went downhill. Post after post seemed to make me feel worse. Made me feel like I wasn’t good enough and that I should really think about letting my dream go. Even after I tried encouraging myself by posting, “You are so close. Stay focused,” it didn’t work. Nothing worked.
Eventually, I took a nap. A much needed nap.
After I woke up, I felt better, but was still a bit down. I kept second guessing some of my decisions. I know what God has shown me, and I’ve been listening and following His guidance. However, this is the first time in the past two years that I have actually felt like throwing in the towel and saying I’m done. Life was so much easier. It may have been stressful and full of anxiety, but I always knew what to expect. Plus, I wasn’t alone. I had coworkers and colleagues I could could talk to. Now I’m solo.
Anyway, while scrolling through Facebook (yes, I got back on social media), I came across a one minute video that someone had shared. Within that one minute, the guy said EXACTLY what I needed to hear. He said that even though things begin to go left and look nothing like you envisioned, you can’t give up. He said that if he had given up, he wouldn’t be doing what he loves doing, today. This guy wasn’t a celebrity nor well known. He was someone who had an idea and stuck with it until it became a reality.
On most days I feel like I’m not getting anywhere. Like I’m doing what I know I’m meant to do, but nothing is happening. It’s frustrating at times but I keep going because I really do love what I do. I have a few things coming up that I’m looking forward to doing. I’ll be more involved with the community so I’m excited about that.
Yeah… today was just a bad day.
I know that someday I will be doing what I’ve dreamed. I just have to be patient and keep allowing God to lead.
Just thinking – It’s funny how the same thing that motivates you one day can discourage you the next. Life is so weird. Can’t help but to love it though because it makes a great story. And I love a good story. Smiling
It’s Shaun’s World 