The Storms

Storms are designed to make us stronger. They’re preparing us for something greater.

Moi. October 26, 2022. Facebook Memory

How many of you have experienced storms that you now look back on and know you are stronger because of them? I know I have. Now when I look back, I see how those storms made me a stronger person.

Story time…

Here is one example of a storm I honestly thought I would never make it through. It wasn’t until a recent conversation with my daughter that I realized that storm was only one small part of my life. Guess I should give her credit for that revelation. She reminded me that that was only two years of my life. Now, those two years did have lifetime consequences but they were worth it because she’s here.

So, thinking about the quote above and Karen’s situation on Tyler Perry’s Sistas, here’s a real story.

Back in 1992, I met this guy I was attracted to. I pursued him and we became a couple. (Giving y’all the short version.) Well, about two months into this relationship I discovered I was actually in an situationship—I guess you can call it an entanglement. Yep… I discovered he had a pregnant girlfriend. We were stationed in Germany at the time and the girlfriend was in the U.S. For years I blamed myself for not leaving when I found out. Why the heck did I stay? When I asked him about it (found out through someone else), he confirmed it and asked if I was going to stay or leave. I chose to stay. I mean, I really liked him. Y’all, that ended up being the craziest two years of my life.

A year later, he went home on leave and married the other girl. He blamed his parents for pressuring him into getting married because of the baby. Said he was getting it annulled but never did. He apologized. I stayed. Then just when I couldn’t take it anymore and was about to leave—had just gotten orders to Florida—I found out I was pregnant. What a crazy time. Of course the drama didn’t end there but that’s all I am going to write about. One day I’ll write a book because that was one wild ride.

Now, about Karen and her situation. One night she and her ex, Zac, had sex and now she’s pregnant. She had wanted to get pregnant while they were together but it never happened. Well, now that he’s with Fatima, who’s also pregnant (she announced it on Zatima but the news hasn’t made it to Sistas yet), she’s finally pregnant.

During last night’s episode, Karen let Aaron, the guy she was seeing, go (see my previous blog, Aaron). You see, when she found out she was pregnant she really didn’t know who the father was; however, she wanted it to be Zac’s. Last night she revealed that the baby she’s carrying is indeed Zac’s. We’re still wondering how she found out when she’s only 3-4 (Tylerland) months along. What tests did she have performed? Anyhoo… that’s a discussion for another time. After breaking the news to Aaron, she asked him to leave. Although he didn’t want to go, he left. Sadly, he would have stayed just like me. I guess this is why he’s my favorite. He told her that he didn’t care if the baby wasn’t his, he was still going to be there if she needed him. Even though I was only two months into the relationship when I found out about the pregnant girlfriend, I was prepared to do the same and basically did.

Unlike Aaron’s story (and maybe it’s still being written), my ending had an amazing plot twist. I ended up with the best blessing ever, my daughter. About a year after I left Germany, I found out he had gotten a divorce and that the other baby wasn’t even his. Life…

Those two years of heaven and hell—I can’t lie, I had some really good times with him—produced something so beautiful, my baby girl. Y’all, that was some storm! But because of her, I became a stronger woman.

Side Note: As for our entanglement. His girlfriend knew we were together before they got married. His parents knew. I had talked to all of them several times. Was even sending the baby clothes and gifts. Basically, I was being a stepmom without the marriage. Then, he married her. Broke my heart… but I stayed. He did try to come back after the divorce but I couldn’t do it. I didn’t have anyone else but I just couldn’t. Like I said, one day I’ll write a book.

Let me go back to sleep. Lol. Guess I’ll mark this as my first true rambling on this side of 50. Laughing. I am so very grateful God got me through all of that. Can’t say it enough, I am truly blessed.♥️

Shaun