Tag: hurt

Decided to include two Facebook memories in this morning’s post. Even though one is about healing from hurt and the other about love, I believe they were meant to be shared together.

Facebook Memory: December 16, 2018

Today’s message: “Hearing When You’re Hurting.” Bishop T.D. Jakes

Sometimes emotional pain is worse than physical pain, and it’s harder to heal. So many people are in pain. Some of it stems from years of hurt. But God is a healer. Amen

Facebook Memory: December 16, 2022

Love is patient.
Love is kind.
Love is understanding.
Love ALWAYS wins.♥️

As I mentioned earlier, I thought the two memories should be shared together. Have you ever heard the phrase, “hurt people hurt people”? Well, I never bought into the idea until recently. I used to believe that the phrase only referred to people who intentionally hurt others. You know, the vindictive ones. I never considered the unintentional hurts.

I believe it is not until you are healed that you realize you hurt someone else because you were hurt.

Without going into too many details, that’s exactly what happened before I decided to divorce my ex. After 17 years of holding on to the pain of my daughter’s father abandoning me (and all the other craziness), I forgave him. Y’all, that was when everything changed. My entire outlook on life had changed because I was no longer in pain. Sadly, my eyes were opened and I began seeing all the damage I had caused. This included my marriage. Up until then, I honestly hadn’t realize I had married him out of pain. Little did I know, I was one of those hurt people who hurt people.

Now love…

I believe love is everything I had defined it to be—patient, kind, and understanding. However, I do not believe it is possible to fully love someone else while you are still in pain. Shoot…you don’t fully love yourself because if you did, you would let go of the pain. I still cannot believe it took me 17 years. I almost repeated the same mistake when my ex wouldn’t sign the divorce papers after almost 4 1/2 years. I had to let that pain go.

So, here is what I have learned from my experience. It’s not until you are healed from the pain that you realize—1) your pain can cause you to unintentionally hurt others and 2) fully loving someone else—including yourself—while you are still in pain, is impossible.

Life is definitely full of lessons.

That’s all for now. Thanks for reading. Wishing you a wonderful day. Love you.♥️

Shaun