Always remember, YOU are loved.♥️ ~ Shaun
You Are Loved
What’s The Purpose?
“Do not make a permanent decision based on temporary circumstances.” –Bishop T. D. Jakes
My head wants to sever ties but my spirit and heart will not let me. I know there is a purpose behind the pain and madness. Just wish I knew what that purpose was.
Maybe there is some kind of lesson I am meant to learn from this. Or, some kind of super power I am supposed to gain from being so strong. Will I receive some kind of award or prize for my perseverance? If so, I would love to receive it while I am still living. I would love to experience heaven on earth and while I am young enough to enjoy it.
Honestly, though, I must be failing the assignment because I keep going through the same thing. Like, different year, same stuff. It is as if this cycle is stuck on repeat. What am I missing? What step am I overlooking or avoiding? When I tell you I feel like I am in one of those escape rooms and just when I think I am finally about to escape, I enter another hallway with more rooms that lead to nowhere. Is there even a way out?
Can I scream, now????
Yes, knowing the purpose of it all would definitely help… or would it?
Only God knows. I guess my job is to keep going, to keep playing. Eventually, I will win! Right?
Shaun
The Water
There’s just something about being near the water that makes life seem a little better. Drove down to the coast to sit on the beach for a while. Found this lone gazebo. Gonna sit out here and listen to my music and read before the rain comes in.
God is good. Life is good. I’m blessed.
God’s Love
God’s love will not let you fail. You WILL succeed.♥️ ~Shaun
Trusting God 2
This morning I woke up with Donnie McClurkin’s song “I’ll Trust You, Lord,” playing over and over in my head. Here’s the intro of the song:
What if you call Me and don’t feel Me near you will you still trust Me?
What if I tell you to let go of everything that you think you have to hold, will you trust Me?
Yes, I’ll trust You Lord
What if it costs my life, yes I’ll trust You Lord
What if I lose the very thing I love so dear, yes I’ll trust You Lord
Today, I am trusting God to see me through this. I believe my brother’s death hurt differently because it was so unexpected. This one is different. Every time she was admitted to the hospital, my heart prepared for the worse, but she always managed to pull through. I knew this time was different. I felt it. Thought I was prepared…
P.S. Sorry I am writing about the same thing. This is my way of coping. I just need to write. I have to. I want to be strong and pretend life is the same, but it isn’t and I am sad. If you’re tired of hearing about my mom’s death, please feel free not to read any of my blogs for a while because honestly, I am not sure when I will stop writing about it. It might be today or a year from now. This is my world… my life… my reality. I’m okay, just need to write. Thanks for understanding… or not.
Shaun
Trusting God
I feel lost. I understand what needs to be done, personally and professionally; however, I am not sure of what move to make next. Where do I go from here?
From September of 1998 up until Momma’s death, every decision I made was somewhat centered around her. She was always calculated into my every move. Where I lived. The trips I took. Her care. Her needs. All of it. Now, her life and journey is no more. It is finished. Complete. Now what?
This morning my phone vibrated and my first thought was something had happened to Momma. Then I remembered she’s no longer here. I didn’t cry. Didn’t really know what to do. As I mentioned, I just feel lost. Hopefully by this afternoon I will have a plan for the rest of the week. I do not like being in this head space. I have so much to do personally and professionally. I have obligations to meet and all I want to do right now is be.
Life…
Trusting God to guide me through this process because I need him right now. I know I say this all of the time, but my kids are the best. They are my rocks. Grateful and blessed.♥️♥️
It’s Shaun’s World 
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