It’s Time To Live

Was looking back through my Facebook memories a little while ago. I try not to spend so much time in the past, but that’s where I find a lot of my answers. Saw the following memory this morning, but didn’t pay much attention to it. However, this evening, it caught my eye.

As you can see, I had one of my “Aha” moments. This was when I realized I had been making decisions based on pivotal moments in my life.

It was in April of 1994 that I had decided to make a few life changes. Little did I know, life was about to change me. I’ll say it was around this time in April that I had received orders (a new military assignment) to go to Florida. I was about to leave Germany and my trifling boyfriend. Already had in my mind how I was going to be FREE! We had just broken up and I felt like I finally had a handle on life. Well, by the end of the month, and I know the exact date, I was back with him.

Long story, short… I really need to write a book. Maybe in my 80’s or 90’s. That night will forever be etched in my memory. It’s the night he told me he was going to give me what I wanted…a baby. I laughed it off. For over a year I had wanted to be pregnant, but it never happened. Yeah… I was young and naive, but I really wanted a baby. I wanted someone who would love me unconditionally—and she actually does (my blessing🥰).

Six weeks later, I went to the doctor’s office for one thing and left with what seemed to be the worst news of my life, I was pregnant. Y’all, I had already made up my mind that I was moving on. Then…BAM!!

From that day on, even until recently, most decisions I have made have been somewhat based on what happened for me—no longer going to use “to me”—during that time. My baby became my priority. She became my life. Then the divorce happened, and she and my son became my life. Every decision I have made has been somewhat based on them. They have been trying to get me to enjoy life for myself, but I have been hesitant. Honestly, I am not really sure how to live as a single person. However, I believe it is finally time that I learned.♥️

This is Year50…

Shaun