It’s not what you do when people are looking, it’s what you do when they aren’t.
I found several definitions for the word “integrity.” Here are a few from Merriam-Webster–
1. A firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values: incorruptibility
2. An unimpaired condition: soundness
3. The quality or state of being complete or undivided: completeness
I have heard that people begin thinking about their legacy around the age of 50. I did not believe it was true until now. Lately, I have been thinking about my legacy and one of the things that came to mind was integrity. I would like to be remembered for my integrity; also for my kindness, my love for humanity, and my love for God and life.
I shared this last year and it is just as relevant today.
“Focus on what’s ahead, not what was left behind. Believe me, God has so much more planned for your future. Trust Him.” – Moi, June 20, 2022
Do not look back. God has something greater planned.
Not sure why, but I woke up feeling somewhat anxious and in a panic. I cannot remember if I had a bad dream or what. Maybe it had something to do with me falling asleep with a lot on my mind… other people’s problems, to be exact. Thankfully, the feeling is passing.
Lately, I have come across so many people in pain, mentally and emotionally. The weirdest part is the people who are hurting and finally being very transparent about their pain–or forced to be transparent because all of their dirty laundry is on public display–are the so called rich or wealthy. It is so heartbreaking. Money can buy experiences and lots of things, but it cannot buy the things people truly need most–unconditional love and peace. No amount of signed NDAs or gag orders will ever give them the peace they seek.
Sadly, many of these people have built entire personas to mask their real lives. They look fabulous and perform well; however, they are absolutely a mess underneath. With time, that mask eventually falls revealing everything they tried to hide.
Y’all, people are really hurting. And I am not only talking about celebrities. I’m talking about entrepreneurs, influencers and self-made millionaires. They appear to have it all because they are finally able to do all of the things they dreamed, yet they are still mentally and emotionally unwell. My heart truly weeps for them. My question is, where is their support system? Have they been pushed away? Have they been replaced with an online audience or followers?
Okay… I’m done. Maybe this is another layer of baggage that I need to shed, internalizing others’ problems. Their problems are not mine to solve or deal with. Going forward I must remind myself that I cannot save or heal the world, that is God’s job. My job is to show love and kindness, and keep them in my prayers.
Now that I have released their problems, let me go back to sleep. I pray you have a blessed day.
Today, I am celebrating my father, my daddy. I love this man!
These last several years have been very difficult for him. I have watched him push through two strokes, eye surgeries, hearing loss, the death of two of his siblings and the death of his only son. ALL of this has happened since 2018.
When I called him earlier, he was shaving. Not sure if he’s going to church or to his shop, probably both. In spite of everything that has happened, he keeps going. Can’t slow him down. Y’all, I love my daddy.
Happy Father’s Day, Mr. Sutton!
To all of the fathers and father figures reading this, Happy Father’s Day! Today… andevery day… belongs to you. We see you, we love you and you do matter!♥️
The countdown for the last seven days has officially begun! As I wrote this morning, I feel so blessed and loved. It’s such an indescribable, yet fascinating feeling. Almost euphoric. Even with my mom passing and life still lifing, I can feel what’s happening around me, but then again, I can’t. It’s like that saying–“Ships don’t sink because of the water that’s around them; ships sink because of the water that gets in them.” Yes, that pretty much sums it all up. All kinds of craziness is still happening around me, but none of it is touching me. Y’all, that’s God!
On another note, a couple of days ago, I watched Gabrielle Union-Wade’s documentary, “My Journey to 50.” So much of her experience during the last few days of her 40s resonated with what I am currently experiencing. Y’all, it had me all in my feelings. Although her journey took place in Africa, the spiritual part is what I mostly identified with. Just as I have been writing about these past few weeks–that extra baggage–she spoke about leaving past traumas on this side of 50. She refused to take them into the next half of her life. Again, same with me. I refuse to take any of the traumas, triggers, hurts, heartaches, disappointments, insecurities and self-sabotaging ways into the next half of my life. I absolutely refuse to!
Y’all, life is just so interesting. Never knew 50 would get here so quickly. I keep asking myself where did the time go. Instead of feeling resentful or like a failure for not achieving my goals (because I spent a lot of my 30s and 40s doing just that), I feel like I have been given another opportunity to do anything I want, a reset with no limits!
Anyhoo… I’m going to end here. I know this was pretty random. I decided to write all of this this evening since tomorrow’s Father’s Day. Didn’t want to add all of this to my Father’s Day post. Lol
It’s Shaun’s World 
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