I originally wrote something different for my first post today than what I shared. After I had written what I wrote, I heard that still small, almost faint voice say, “Delete it.” And I obeyed. When I clicked on YouTube to watch something inspirational, this video was there—a message from the late Dr. Charles Stanely. The title says it all, “Listening To God.” Here’s the video and link:
Me at my “man’s” (he was 21—barely a man😂) dorm room. We had no idea what we were doing. Lol. Life…
Thought I’d be asleep by now but I am wide awake. The Facebook memory above has me smiling because in 10 days I will have a 30 year old!🎉
When I took that picture, I had no idea my life would be totally different two years later. You couldn’t have told me I would be pregnant, single, and broken, and I’d believe it. There was no way!
I’m smiling because I remember that young girl who was pretending to be a grown woman. She had so much to learn about people and life, but she thought she knew it all. Couldn’t convince her otherwise.
I smile at her innocence.
I smile at her perception of life and people. She believed in everything good.
I smile because she was once me.
I was once her.
I’m still her.
Just older, wiser…and a little lot heavier.☺️
What a journey this life has been. I am forever grateful for the experiences, good and bad, because both made me who I am today. I’m not going to lie, I do miss her.🥰
So, this year is already starting differently. I decided to watch something I believed would set the tone for this year. Well, what I wasn’t expecting was the tone I received. Laughing because I thought I was watching something that would empower me, but instead, I was introduced to the kind of husband (yes, I’m getting married again) I desired. Y’all, I’m looking for my Jimmy Carter!
Talk about an “Aha” moment!
Before 2024 ended, I said I was going to focus on my personal life this year. Well, I guess this is the beginning.
When I think about it, Jimmy Carter was the kind of person I’ve been seeking since I knew what love was and could be. I mean, why not? He’s been my inspiration since I was in grade school. My purpose—to make this world a better place through love, hope, peace, kindness, and service—began with him. And his relationship with Rosalynn was what I’d always dreamed of having. So many doubt that kind of relationship and love is possible. However, I have never doubted it. I’ve always believed it to be possible. Because I truly believe in love.
Soooo… it’s been Jimmy all this time. Wow!
Here’s an Instagram trailer for the Hulu and Disney+ special I just watched—“Jimmy Carter: A Full Life.” Enjoy!♥️ ~Shaun
Sitting here trying to reflect on my 2024, but everything seems a blur. I have journal entries and posts marking moments, but everything seems to have happened without a thought. As if I just flowed through it—which is what I asked for, right? I mean, I did say I just wanted to go with the flow. Laughing because God will give you exactly what you ask for. Gotta love life…
Now, don’t get me wrong, I had many memorable moments, but nothing was a real highlight. So, maybe I need to change my ask this year. This year, I don’t want to just go with the flow. This year I want to experience the spectacular! This year, I want to make memories and moves that I will be talking about for ages.
A week or so before the year ended, I said I was taking the limits off myself and God. Well, they’re off, and I’m challenging myself to stretch beyond what’s familiar and comfortable. I started implementing a few changes before 2024 ended. Ready to see where they take me!♥️ ~Shaun
Shaun, I’m rooting for you, Girl! I got you and God’s definitely got you! Happy 2025!🥂
While looking through an old notebook that I was using as a journal and as a study guide (not sure why I was using one notebook for both😩), I found a letter I had written but never sent to my sister. Here’s a snippet of what I wrote.
30 January 1993
At the time, I was 19 years old and stationed at Ramstein AB, Germany. Y’all, I was just a baby. However, even back then, I made note of gems that I still live by today:
True happiness can only be found within. (Thanks, Master Splinter)
God will place us where we desire to be, but it’s our responsibility to make things happen. (A good one, right?!)
Life isn’t easy… but it’s so worth living.
As I mentioned in the letter, I was where I had always dreamed of being, but I wasn’t doing anything with the opportunity I had been given. Looking back, I realize no one in my circle had the same or similar goals or dreams. So, instead of venturing out and doing my own thing, I adapted to their world. From what I had written—“I don’t have any goals anymore.”—I believe I had lost hope.
How sad…
But very eye opening.
It’s so important that we surround ourselves with like-minded people or our dreams and aspirations will suffer. Or…we must be strong enough to venture out and do our own thing to keep our dreams alive.
For several years now (since December 24, 2018), I have shared the same quote from Michelle Obama’s book “Becoming”–
“Am I good enough? Yes, in fact I am.”
For years, I questioned my worth. Seeing Michelle Obama (who’s #4 on my infamous list of people to meet) mention it in her book gave me hope. If she also questioned her worth at times and still surpassed her wildest dreams, then I could, too.
In 2018, I began a doctoral program to earn my DrPH (Doctor of Public Health) degree. I decided to pursue this degree after experiencing one of my most crushing moments professionally. Before then, I was always on top of my game. Personally, my life was in the pits, but professionally, it was taking off. Y’all, I was “The Research Diva!” I was so confident and sure of myself and where my career was going. Other professionals and organizations had begun contacting me because of my experience and expertise. However, I hadn’t accounted for some only reaching out because of the fact that I was Black. Once I realized I was only being used because of the color of my skin and my ability to reach populations some couldn’t, I was crushed.
After this realization, every project I was asked to work on, I questioned why I was asked. Was it because of the color of my skin? Did they truly recognize my worth? That’s when I felt if I had my doctorate, my race wouldn’t matter. But I already knew the answer to that, too.
So, for six years, I pursued the DrPH degree. I started strong, but then life happened…COVID happened…then life again. Last year, when I shared her quote, I had just finished another semester of the program, and I had a decision to make—spend more money working towards a degree that I was only pursuing to be deemed worthy or to withdraw. In May of this year, I finally withdrew from the program. Part of me felt like a failure because I couldn’t push past the fact that I was only doing it to prove my worth. Like girl, still get the degree! Then, the other half felt relieved because I could finally focus on the things I wanted to pursue, my real goals and dreams. I’m not sure if I’ll ever be referred to as Dr. LaShaundrea B.; however, I know I am worth more than a title and credentials.
Soooo…
Am I good enough?
Baby, YES! I’m more than good enough!
I now realize I needed to go through all of that craziness to get to where I am today. I can see where my ego and pride could’ve eventually been my downfall and at a higher level. Life is truly a journey.
Well, that’s all I have at the moment. Listen, if you are currently questioning if you are good enough, this is assurance that you are. You are more than good enough. You’re the best!♥️
It’s Shaun’s World 
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