hope

The Good Times

Good Morning!☀️

They say time heals all wounds. Well, good memories soothes the soul.

Shared on October 11, 2022 with the caption, “Remember the good times; they will keep you afloat during the bad.”

Time and great memories are key to getting through tough times. Be sure to hold those memories close.

Praying you have a wonderful day and a lovely weekend.♥️

Love you,

Shaun

hope

Hello Sunday

Good Morning!☀️

First, I want to thank everyone who said a prayer for me yesterday. It wasn’t easy for me to share how I was feeling. I had actually shared a more detailed post hours earlier, then unpublished it soon afterwards. As I said in my previous post, I hate feeling vulnerable, and openly sharing that much of my life made me feel so. So, thank you for allowing me a space to share because I really needed it. At the time that I posted it, I was on my way from the airport to the hotel and was trying not to start bawling during the ride. However, trying to hold it in was short lived. As soon as I got to the front desk to check in, the tears started pouring out, and I was boohooing all over the place. Y’all, I was so embarrassed, but couldn’t stop. Everyone was hugging me. I mean everyone. Even people waiting in the lobby. I was a mess…

After I got to my room, I FaceTimed my daughter and the first words out of her mouth were, “You look terrible!” And I did! That was my first time seeing myself. Y’all, I had been crying the whole trip—on my to the airport, on the plane, during my layover. The tears just kept coming. The other part of her response was laughter (we tend to do this at the weirdest times). Baby she laughed! And I couldn’t help but laugh too because I looked horrible! She kept apologizing, but said she’d never seen me look so bad in my life. Like I was in some movie or something. Then we laughed even more. I had planned on going to the opening ceremony last night, but was advised by my daughter to sit it out. She was like you already look bad, the last thing you want to do is be crying all over the place. So, I took her advice—even though I really wanted to hear our opening speaker. Then, I went and got something to eat, took a shower, and got in bed.

Y’all, I love my hearts. My son said to let him know if I needed anything. As if he could do much from hundreds of miles away. But his heart was in the right place. When I tell you I am truly blessed.

I don’t know how today will go. I feel much better, now. However, the grief that I experienced yesterday was so unexpected. So, I can only pray that today will be a more pleasant day. Something did come to mind—which could’ve been a trigger—I was attending a conference when my brother died. I was at a state conference in the same city as his hospital. Had seen him the night before. He just kept saying he was tired. So tired. He had been in ICU over a week and they’d tried everything. By the way, he had MRSA, one of the worst staph infections you can get, and it had spread to his heart. We never figured out how he got it. The doctors wanted to try one more surgery to see if it would help or prolong his life. I remember calling my stepmom to tell her I was about to leave the conference to head back to the hospital and she told me not to rush because he was gone. That they were waiting on everyone to make it to the hospital to say our final goodbyes. So maybe I was subconsciously triggered by the conference and it being his birthday. When I tell you life be lifeing for real!

Well, I’m going to end here. Going to turn over and get a few more hours of sleep before I start my day. Can’t wait to mingle, network and enjoy the free food samples. Outside of the National Restaurant Association Show (it’s huge!), our conference has some of the best food vendors. Met one yesterday while waiting for my food. Can’t wait to stop by their booth.☺️

As always, thank you so much for reading. Hopefully what I’ve written makes sense, if not it’s okay. I just needed to write. Now, I need to go back to sleep. However, before I do, I’ll end with this Facebook memory, which is very timely. Can’t make this stuff up!

Facebook Memory: October 6, 2023

You better live! Life isn’t slowing down or waiting for you to catch up. Stop putting everyone else first like they’re more important than you. Listen… and hear me good… No one is more important or more valuable than you are. No one! You’re not being selfish, self-centered or inconsiderate. Nah… You’re just recognizing your worth. Now it’s time you start living in it. Love you!♥️

Message received.

Have a blessed Sunday!♥️

Love you,

Shaun

hope

Love Isn’t Love Until It’s Given Away

Good Morning! Smiling right now because I had planned on sharing the Facebook memory below, but this song keeps blaring over and over in my head. Yes, blaring! Laughing. So, I guess I’ll share both.

The song is “Love Isn’t Love” by Commissioned. It says, “Love isn’t love til you’ve given it away. It’s just waiting to be given. All bitterness erased.” That’s the part that’s stuck on repeat. Now it’s out. I pray whoever needs the message receives it. Smile. Now here’s today’s Facebook memory.

Facebook Memory: September 4, 2023

“When you’re ready to do it, you will do it. You won’t need motivation. The conditions won’t have to be right. You won’t have to have the money. Shoot… fear won’t even stop you. When you’re ready to make your move, you’ll make it, and everything else will fall into place.🤷🏽‍♀️”

All true. When you make up your mind to do something, you’ll just do it. It’s really that simple. It’s funny how we go back and forth with ourselves worried about what will and won’t work, and then one day, out of the blue, we just do it. I’m laying here thinking about so many things I was hesitant to do—some out of fear, others because I didn’t believe I was capable of doing—and then one day I just woke up and did them. Life is truly amazing.

Well, that’s it for now. I pray you have a wonderful day!♥️

Love you,

Shaun

Also, I’ll leave you with Commissioned’s song, “Love Isn’t Love.” Be Blessed

hope

Questions I Asked Myself

Hello! How are you? Yep, I’m speaking first. Smile. You are much too important for me not too. Believe me, you really do matter.💕


While reading past journal entries, which I do pretty often, I came across a few questions I had asked myself. I was in the process of addressing a few hurts and making this side of 50 different from the last. Although I did not have an answer for them at that time, and some I am still working on, I began to intentionally observe the things that were happening around me and to me, and how they were affecting my life.

Here’s what I asked myself:

1. What is it about me that the devil does not want to succeed?

2. What does God have for me that is so great that I must stay broken so that it will not happen?

3. Where do I see myself if I do not heal?

Several posts ago I wrote, “Healing begins when we acknowledge our pain.” I saw the future of the unhealed version of me and the future of the healed version, and decided I wanted the healed version. Which meant I had to push through the pain.

Now, just being transparent, I am still a work in progress. Just like weight gain and weight loss, neither happens overnight. Both happen gradually. And for those who happen to lose it fast, if their behavior doesn’t change and their mindset isn’t right, the change won’t last. I want my healing to last so I am putting in the work to make it happen. The successful, healed version that the devil does not want to succeed is my goal.

Have you had to ask yourself similar questions? Just asking because I know I can’t be the only one who has needed to heal, or is healing.

Be Blessed!♥️

Shaun

hope

Stay Strong | Stay Focused

Shared on July 19, 2021

On July 19, 2021, I shared the image above with the caption, “Stay strong. Stay focused. You’ve got this.” I even have it pinned to one of my pages.

Stay strong. Stay focused.

Seems like that’s been the story of my life. For as far back as I can remember, I’ve always had to be the strong one. I’ve always had to be the focused one. What would ever happen if I no longer wanted to be the strong one, or no longer wanted to be focused. Would the world fall apart? Would my world fall apart?

Transparent moment…

I’m not sure what’s going on with me. This past week has been mentally and emotionally draining. Last Friday I met up with my sisters and their families for a weekend reunion. It was great seeing everyone and their families. I was solo.

Solo

I didn’t think it would bother me as much as it did. Not even sure why it is bothering me now. This is where the, “Stay strong. Stay focused,” has always come in and rescued me. I would redirect my attention so that I would not feel (even though I am an emotional person) whatever negative feelings I was feeling at the moment. As I have mentioned before, I hate feeling sad or anything negative. So, I tend to seek out positive, uplifting things, which I believe we should. However, do I ever fully process those negative feelings? Hmm… I believe I allow the process to get to a certain point and then pull back. Sometimes I believe I pull back because I was always led to believe God doesn’t want us to feel anything negative.

Y’all, just listening to myself process my emotions have me thinking about the movie, “Inside Out.” I have only seen the first movie but have heard so much about the sequel. Maybe I’ll go see it today.

Anyhoo… let me get back on track. As I was saying, I was led to believe negative emotions were not godly so I would force myself to find positive things or “get over it.” Well, I am tired of getting over it and being strong and being focused. Honestly, it’s not even me, it’s like my soul is tired of me not allowing myself to process those feelings. So, this time, whether I like it or not, it’s happening. I have even found myself being honest this week when people have asked how I’m doing. I have responded with, “Not well. Nothing major. Don’t feel like going into details.” Does it make me appear vulnerable or weak? Perhaps. But it’s the truth. I can hear people saying, “Never let people know when you’re down.” Yeah… that’s what I have done the majority of my life and I am tired. I’m tired of not fully feeling. I believe I have to fully feel and process my feelings before I can move forward. If this means appearing weak, so be it. As I stated in my original message, my purpose is greater than my distractions. And me worrying about what others think is a distraction.

Today, my focus is on feeling every ounce of what I am feeling. No holding back. No redirecting. It’s time to feel so I can fully heal.

That’s all I have at the moment, which I guess is enough. And for those who cringe because you think I am oversharing, please move on. It’s your voices that have kept me from fully feeling. Instead of criticizing me, please send up prayers for a complete healing because it’s what I would do for you. Love you.♥️

Shaun