I promise this is the last post for today. My daughter is headed back home, my son is at work, and I am left alone deep in thought. I have absolutely no idea what is going on this year, especially during my Jubilee year, but it’s a lot. Confusion, chaos, hatred, you name it. Much more negative energy in the atmosphere than positive. I see it. I feel it. As much as I would love the kumbaya moments to happen and last, they seem far and few in between.
This past year I have witnessed people do things out of pure spite just to be noticed. No one thinks about the consequences of their actions. They can care less who they harm. It’s all about Me, Me, Me, and trending. And most of the time the true victims aren’t the people they intend to hurt but those connected to them. Y’all, people will literally sell their souls and relationships just for momentary satisfaction. Then when the feeling and fame wears off they search for more ways to become relevant, even if it does more harm. What is this world coming to?
I guess this means I need to do more to spread light and love. I know people are better than this. I think it’s time I become more intentional about finding like minded people who would rather build bridges than tear them down. People who, when hurt or angered, do not lash out, but instead extend kindness, mercy, and grace. Y’all, love must win!
My heart is breaking for humanity right now. I have to remain hopeful that things will get better soon.🙏🏽♥️
God always gives us a glimpse of what destiny spaces may look like—the people, the places, the mindsets, the atmosphere. Sometimes He even allows a test run just to see if it is something we are sure we want, or to get a feel of the environment. As I wrote yesterday, it’s our “yes” that actually sets things in motion.
I am 12 days shy of entering the final month of my Jubilee year. Thanking God for the test run. So grateful He didn’t let me give up. So grateful He kept pushing me forward. I’m blessed.♥️ ~Shaun
Facebook Memories: May 12, 2022
Can you see it? Can you feel it? Are you already living it even though you’re nowhere near it?
You can believe until you’re blue in the face. If you can’t see it, you’ll never have it. Just sharing God’s message to me. Thought you could use it too.🤷🏽♀️
The quote below was taken from a book of encouraging words my mom had written a while back. Thought I would also include guidance and patience because all three are definitely needed—strength, guidance, and patience.♥️ ~Shaun
Praying for strength, guidance, and patience while waiting for the right solution.
Today is the first anniversary of my mom’s passing. I still remember her screaming “Hallelujah” over and over again before she had her last seizure—which was the day before she officially passed. I honestly believe she left us at that moment. However, we waited for her to recover as she had done before, but she never did. She was in a coma.
I mean, we knew she was passing. We weren’t naive. For months her appetite had been slowly decreasing. Her blood levels were steadily declining. Almost every other week she was getting a transfusion. Her stage 4 wound wasn’t healing and she had become septic…again…as she had become every couple of weeks. Yes, we knew she was dying but we just wanted her to look at us one more time. We kept trying to wake her up by singing her favorite songs, talking to her about her favorite shows and meals, washing her face, everything. But nothing worked. No eye movement. No sign of irritation whenever they came in to change the dressing on her wound. Nothing. The only signs of life were the numbers on the monitor that were gradually dropping.
On the morning of her passing, the doctor told us it was time for us to make the final decision. The oxygen and blood pressure medicine were the only things keeping her alive for us. Basically, she was already gone. They had tried taking her off several times before and her oxygen and blood pressure levels plummeted. Because she was a DNR, they wanted to make sure we were ready for what was to come before disconnecting everything.
After they removed the oxygen and IVs, we waited for something dramatic to happen. Thought she would immediately go into cardiac arrest. According to several nurses, the end wasn’t always pleasant. But nothing happened. The nurses asked if we wanted them to give her some pain medicine and we declined. She had been in severe pain for years and that was the first time we had seen her at complete peace. They told us to let them know if she became uncomfortable or began to moan and they would give her something. Again, nothing happened. She just appeared to be asleep. Which is how she said she wanted to die. She told us she had prayed and asked God to let her die in her sleep. And she did.
From around 2 PM until a little after 9 PM, we sat with her as her numbers slowly decreased. We took turns holding her hands and rubbing her forehead until they became cold and grayish. We didn’t immediately call the nurse in after we knew she was gone. We just sat there in silence.
Our momma…
Dorothy Ree, we miss you!
Didn’t realize it last year, but on this day 10 years ago (May 9, 2014), we were preparing for Momma’s graduation. On May 10, 2014, after numerous attempts (started in 1976) she finally received her bachelor’s degree.
We have all been dreading this day. Been grieving for a whole year. Some days have been better than others. For me, last night was really rough. The tears just kept flowing, as they are now. I’m not bawling but the tears just seem to be flowing from nowhere.
Think I will end here. I may or may not share a second post today, or I might share several. I’m just going to go with the flow.
It’s Shaun’s World 
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