Tag: Wednesday

Life

Wednesday Writings

Shaun Bradford

You cannot be who you’re going to be and who you used to be, at the same time.

Bishop T.D. Jakes

I shared this quote six years ago. Today, I feel like I’m finally living in the space of where I’m meant to be as well as becoming the woman I’m meant to become. It’s taken me a while to get here. HA! Almost half a century! (Smiling) But I’m here.

Yes.. I am here!

Okay, let me stop and give myself roses for making it thus far because I absolutely deserve them.

You see, I’m so proud of myself for not giving up when times got hard. Oooo.. if you only knew how many times I just wanted to give up and settle where I was. I’m also proud of myself for rolling with the punches. Whew! I’ve taken so many hits over the years– disappointments, heartaches, heartbreaks and losses. Sometimes I stumbled. Sometimes I fell. However, through the grace and strength of God (all Him) I always managed to bounce back stronger than ever. Yes, you best believe I’m resilient!

Lastly, but most importantly, I’m so proud of my relationship with God. Y’all, for as far back as 5 or 6 years old, I have always acknowledged God’s presence in my life. I love my relationship with Him and I love where He’s taking me. Even though I can’t see the entire picture, I can look back over my life and see where I’ve been compared to where I am now, and know my future will be great. Y’all, I’m truly blessed.

So, to refer back to the quote. No, I cannot be who I used to be and who I’m going to be, at the same time. Wouldn’t be honoring God if I did. It’s called–

Maturing

Growing

Evolving

Becoming Me

Thanks for reading and following my journey to becoming the person God’s called me to be. Enjoy your day!

Shaun

Life

Wednesday Writings

Shaun Bradford

Hello June! Oh how I’ve missed you.

Y’all, it’s my birthday month and the final year of my 40s. All I can say is, WHAT A RIDE! Y’all, if my 40s were a movie, it would win Oscars in multiple categories. Like.. for real! Talk about one wonderfully, crazy decade! If someone would have told me my 40s were going to be wild, I would’ve laughed my head off – “Quit playing!”

So, I always set a theme for my birthday year. This past year I focused on embracing my freedom. This next year it’s Smooth Sailing. I just want to lay back, relax, create and let the gentle waves take me wherever they please. Whatever blessings come my way, I’m grasping them without overthinking. And the troubles I encounter.. HA! I’m handing those over to God.

Yep.. Smooth Sailing.

Well, I still have a little over three weeks to build up to the big event. Today I’m celebrating with a road trip and lunch– both work related but I’m going to celebrate like this event was planned in my honor. Then tonight I’m going to chat with a few sistas as we watch our favorite show, Tyler Perry’s Sistas. Yep.. the second half of Season 4 returns tonight! What a way to kick off my celebration!

Anyhoo.. let me publish this so I can get on the road. Enjoy your Wednesday!

Shaun

Life

Moment of Silence

Shaun Bradford

Today I would like to ask you to take a moment of silence to remember those who have recently lost their lives to mass shootings in the United States (May 14 – 24, 2022):

Buffalo, New York (Supermarket)
May 14, 2022
10 lives taken

Laguna Woods, California (Church)
May 15, 2022
1 life taken

Uvalde, Texas (Elementary School)
May 24, 2022
21 lives taken

Prayers for their loved ones who are heartbroken and confused. Prayers for those who are saddened, hurt and angered by those who fail to recognize and address the racial and ethnical issues we have in the U.S.; as well as the gun violence that continues to plague the United States. As much as I desire to see the good in everyone, I’m actually beginning to believe that some people are incapable of love, empathy and compassion. Because if they were, they would care more about lives than their agendas.

I have to remain hopeful or I will become like them.

Shaun

Life

Wednesday Writings

Shaun Bradford

Disclaimer: I have decided to publish the unedited draft of this blog. Not going to change a thing. Talk about completely random! Laughing. Y’all, I’m so fascinated by how the mind works.. how my mind works. Yes, today I’m going to let it be. So, two, 10 or even 30 years from now, I’ll smile when I re-read it. I’ll definitely cringe too. But I’ll smile and say, “That was me. This is me. I love you, Shaun.”

Hello! And Happy Wednesday!

Today is another random blog. Was reading journal entries from 1992 and decided to write about those writings.

On May 20, 1992, I wrote, “Love is so powerful and strong, but when it’s one sided, it’s not so great.” I was 18 years old. Two weeks from enlisting in the Air Force and a little over a month from my 19th birthday. And I was in love. Well.. at least I believed I was.

His name was Will. I usually don’t include names but hey, it’s been 30 years. Yes, Will was his name and I was in “love.” Looking back, what did I really know about love besides what I saw in movies and read in novels. I had to be in love because love hurts, and I was hurting. I mean, the deeper the pain, the deeper the love. Right? Boy, was I confused.

Now, here I am sitting here 30 years later wondering if I have ever been in love. Real love. Or was it that make believe kind of love. Here’s my theory, which I shared with my ex-husband when he would ask if I was in love with him. I would say, “I love you, but I’m not in love with you. Because if you fall in love with someone, you can always fall out of love with them.” Hmm.. It sounded good; however, in all honesty, I didn’t want to be in love because I only remembered the pain associated with it. I never wanted to feel that pain again.

I once read, it’s not love that hurts but the rejection and heartache we associate with love. When I think about it, I believe I have only been in love once.. maybe twice. I say this because they’re the ones I still smile about when I think of them. The ones that still make me feel all warm inside.

I believe when you fall in love with someone, you never fall out of love with them. You can relabel it as, “I care for them,” or “I love them like family,” but deep down you know there’s a difference. Sometimes things aren’t meant to be during this lifetime, or perhaps it happened during a past lifetime, but it happened and you know it because you still feel it.

Love…

Shaun

Life

Wednesday Writings

Shaun Bradford

Happy Wednesday!

Today makes 361 consecutive days of blogging! For some reason, I assumed the one year mark was closer to my birthday, in June. Well, I actually began this journey on May 14, 2021 with this blog, Just Dropping In To Say Hello.

After reading what I wrote almost a year ago, it seems as if I have a pattern of logging off social media around the same time every year. It’s always around this time (April/May) and the end/beginning of the year. Makes me wonder what it is about these specific times that I need to take a break from social media, a.k.a. chaos.

Back in December, I officially logged off my main twitter account, the one that was beginning to make me feel like I didn’t belong and had my anxiety levels through the roof. Imagine feeling like you don’t belong, on your own account. It was crazy!

Well, after logging off, I reverted to my secondary account. The account that I once referred to as “boring.” Shaking my head. I only invited people who I believed I made a positive connection with, to follow me to this account. You know, real people with real lives. I no longer wanted to be in that pretentious, competitive space. I needed calm, boring (anything but.. Lol) and real.. real conversations. Every now and then I get the urge to discuss my shows or a good movie, and I’ll provide a comment or two. However, I will never go back to where I was. I didn’t like it there.

Today, I’m happy where I am, in the spaces I’m in. In last year’s blog I mentioned the Facebook group, We Are Sistas (private group based on Tyler Perry’s Sistas). Well, I’m still there. For a minute though, I was thinking about leaving the group. It was becoming too much like my old Twitter account, too many negative vibes. Then I thought about the people I’ve connected with over the past few years and decided that my bond with them far outweighed the other stuff. Now, Instagram (IG).. I still have a love-hate relationship with it. However, I believe I have unfollowed all of the accounts that used to trigger my anxiety. Either that or I’m becoming better at managing it. Currently, I mainly follow people/accounts that feed my soul. Sorry but I don’t want to hear bitter rants or about how awful people are. I’d rather have a calm, uneventful, inspiring timeline. Oh! And I do follow my shows on IG and Facebook. So I still get to comment on posts and replies whenever the urge hits me. Yes, it’s still my happy space.

Okay y’all.. I did not intend for this blog to be so long. Guess I felt like writing. Hope you’re having a wonderful week thus far and wishing you an even better rest of the week!

Shaun

Life

Wednesday Writings

Shaun Bradford

Lately I’ve experienced bouts of loneliness even with my kids in the house. I’m not sure if I’m bringing it on myself or if it’s happening naturally. Sadly, all I think about is what’s to come. Pretty soon I will only have to care for myself and this makes me feel lonely.

This weekend I attended a fundraiser, then treated myself to lunch. For years I have eaten alone, traveled alone, gone to the movies alone and never felt lonely. But this weekend I felt lonely.

Everything seems to be happening so fast. One minute I’m with my son 24 hours for months without a break (virtual work and schooling for almost 2 years). And I loved it! Now he’s preparing for graduation and college.

The other day I was telling my daughter that I’ve only felt this way once and it was when I was pregnant with her. I had just moved from Germany to Florida and didn’t know anyone. It was just me and my baby bump living alone. Didn’t have a phone and when I got one, I couldn’t make many long distance calls because it was expensive. Oh.. and it was a while before I could purchase a car. Had to walk to work or depend on someone else for a ride. Outside of work, it was just me. I was alone and I felt it. Which is something I never want to feel again.

Fast forward to now. I have a phone but hate using it for talking. I’m a texter. I’m not into pets or people that need constant attention. I don’t like hanging out. However.. I know this sounds weird.. I do like attending events and conferences and socializing. Not sure why. My kids know me so well and are kind of like me. We love our space. We love our quiet time. However, we also love having long, thought-provoking conversations as well as singing, dancing and cooking together. Oh.. and we text each other all day long! I really do love my mini-mes.

Anyhoo.. I know I’ll be just fine. I just need a minute to adjust.

Thanks for reading! Wishing you a wonderful rest of the week.

Shaun

Life

Wednesday Writings

Shaun Bradford

Life is moving right along and I’m moving right along with it. I’m happy. I’m blessed. I’m grateful. I’m humbled. I’m content. I’m at peace. And I’m loved.

As I’ve said before, I’m truly loving this space I’m in. According to my journals, it’s taken me decades to get here, but I’m finally here. And it’s such a wonderful feeling! I don’t ever want to go back to where I was or the way things were.

As the song says, “This joy that I have, the world didn’t give it to me… This peace that I have, the world didn’t give it to me. The world didn’t give it and the world can’t take it away.” Amen

Thank You, Lord, for guiding me through the tough times. For giving me hope when I was hopeless. And for granting me peace like no other. Amen

Thanks for reading! I pray that you’ve also found peace, contentment, love and joy. Be Blessed

Shaun

Life

Wednesday Writings

Shaun Bradford

My nephew shared a quote this morning and the words ring true.

“Everything you now do is something you have chosen to do. Some people don’t want to believe that. But if you’re over age twenty-one your life is what you’re making it. To change your life, you need to change your priorities.” – John C. Maxwell

He also added that due to social determinants it may be difficult to change your life. However, I’ll add, it is not impossible. Sometimes this means making sacrifices (changing priorities) so that you can live a better life – mentally, emotionally, and spiritually as well as financially.

I’ll end with this question–

Are you presently making changes to create a better life for yourself (see meaning above), or are you content with where you are?

Me – I’m making changes.

Thanks for reading and please your day!

Shaun

Life

Wednesday Writings

Shaun Bradford

“Everyone has their own road to travel,” is what I wrote a few years ago. It seems like the older I get the more evident this becomes. No matter how much we want things and relationships to remain the same they won’t. Life is constantly evolving. Everyone has their own lives with their own set of dreams, goals and problems. And of course I have mine!

My world is finally opening back up and it looks totally different from the way it looked pre-COVID. I’m not afraid of what the future holds. However, it saddens me that things are no longer the same. As many of us have experienced, change – positive or negative – can be difficult to accept and adjust to, but it’s so necessary.

On this day three years ago, I wrote: “Reflect, Regroup, Refocus.” Never have I felt the need to do this as much as I do now. Change is inevitable and it’s happening right before my eyes. The only thing that has remained constant, and will always remain constant, is God’s presence and love. And you best believe I’m not letting those go. Nope! I’m leaning on Him even more.

Thanks for reading! Enjoy your day.

Shaun

Life

Wednesday Writings

Shaun Bradford

Seems like this has been one long month; or rather, this month has been one long week. Honestly, it seems as if the hours and tasks have been never ending. I believe I have done more this month than I’ve done in an entire year, two years even. Maybe it’s because things are opening back up, or because I’m finally getting back out. Probably the latter.

I’m not going to lie, it feels good to socialize again. Didn’t realized how much I needed to be around people other than family. I’m a people person. I love meeting people and holding random conversations. So getting back out felt really good. I actually felt like I was living again.

Well, with that said, “living again” has also been very draining, physically as well as mentally. In certain environments I have been able to socialize mask free; however, COVID-19 has always been at the forefront of my mind. Are they vaccinated? Where’s my hand sanitizer? Where’s my mask? Why are they not wearing masks? Social distance, please! Whew, it’s been a lot!

I guess you can say from here on out it’s back to business as normal but with precautions. This coming Saturday my son has another campus tour. Meaning we have to be around people. Then, next week, I have another conference to attend. Which means even more people. Yeah.. no more bubble for me. It’s back to business as usual.

Thanks for reading and please enjoy the rest of your week!

Shaun