Life

Wednesday Writings

Happy Wednesday!

Today makes 361 consecutive days of blogging! For some reason, I assumed the one year mark was closer to my birthday, in June. Well, I actually began this journey on May 14, 2021 with this blog, Just Dropping In To Say Hello.

After reading what I wrote almost a year ago, it seems as if I have a pattern of logging off social media around the same time every year. It’s always around this time (April/May) and the end/beginning of the year. Makes me wonder what it is about these specific times that I need to take a break from social media, a.k.a. chaos.

Back in December, I officially logged off my main twitter account, the one that was beginning to make me feel like I didn’t belong and had my anxiety levels through the roof. Imagine feeling like you don’t belong, on your own account. It was crazy!

Well, after logging off, I reverted to my secondary account. The account that I once referred to as “boring.” Shaking my head. I only invited people who I believed I made a positive connection with, to follow me to this account. You know, real people with real lives. I no longer wanted to be in that pretentious, competitive space. I needed calm, boring (anything but.. Lol) and real.. real conversations. Every now and then I get the urge to discuss my shows or a good movie, and I’ll provide a comment or two. However, I will never go back to where I was. I didn’t like it there.

Today, I’m happy where I am, in the spaces I’m in. In last year’s blog I mentioned the Facebook group, We Are Sistas (private group based on Tyler Perry’s Sistas). Well, I’m still there. For a minute though, I was thinking about leaving the group. It was becoming too much like my old Twitter account, too many negative vibes. Then I thought about the people I’ve connected with over the past few years and decided that my bond with them far outweighed the other stuff. Now, Instagram (IG).. I still have a love-hate relationship with it. However, I believe I have unfollowed all of the accounts that used to trigger my anxiety. Either that or I’m becoming better at managing it. Currently, I mainly follow people/accounts that feed my soul. Sorry but I don’t want to hear bitter rants or about how awful people are. I’d rather have a calm, uneventful, inspiring timeline. Oh! And I do follow my shows on IG and Facebook. So I still get to comment on posts and replies whenever the urge hits me. Yes, it’s still my happy space.

Okay y’all.. I did not intend for this blog to be so long. Guess I felt like writing. Hope you’re having a wonderful week thus far and wishing you an even better rest of the week!

Shaun

Life

Wednesday Writings

Have you ever woke up feeling renewed? Like it’s literally a brand new day, an actual new beginning? Well, this morning, I did! Perhaps it was the six hours of uninterrupted sleep (smile) or a delayed reaction from this day a year ago, the morning after I submitted my letter of resignation. To this day, I still don’t know how I submitted it without a bit of fear or a set plan in place. Y’all, I’m in tears because I KNOW it was God!

So here I am a year later without an ounce of regret. Still on cloud nine. However, the feeling I woke up with this morning is a little different. Today, I’m no longer anxious to take on a million projects. I have no plans of being entrepreneur or volunteer of the year. What I’m feeling is true peace and contentment. Not in a way that I’m not striving to reach new heights, but in a way that I no longer feel rushed. I’m actually going with the flow. I don’t want to mislead you into believing everything has been perfect because it hasn’t. I still have bills, unexpected things continue to pop up, and misfortunes and disappointments happen. However, I no longer allow myself to become stressed or anxious. Now, whenever I feel either creeping in, I remember that I’m not in this alone, God’s got me. That’s when I take a backseat and allow Him to lead. You know, since He knows where He’s taking me. Smile

Thanks for reading! Wishing you a wonderful day.

Shaun

Life

Hello Sunday

Smile

March 13, 2020
“When it’s time, it will happen. Be patient. Nothing that’s meant for me will pass me by. I won’t have to go searching for it, it will find me.”

That’s an excerpt from my journal entry two years ago. Please allow me to pass on the same words of encouragement to you. No matter how grim things look at times, or how many days, months, years or even decades pass, whatever blessings God has for you will not pass you. They won’t be given to someone else. Also, you won’t have to go searching for them. They’ll find you.

Now, ease your mind and carry on. What will be, will be.

Have a lovely Sunday!

Shaun

Life

Wednesday Writings

I’m just going to jump right in. A few days ago, after reviewing several pictures I had taken with a guest speaker at an event, I began criticizing my appearance. Y’all, it was like I couldn’t stop.

Transparent Moment:

I rarely take full body pictures because 1) I do not know how to pose (y’all my poses are terrible 😂) and 2) I’m not comfortable with my weight. So after taking the pictures the guest speaker, I began to openly critique every photo – I looked too fat, too short, the camera wasn’t positioned right, needed a better camera (HA.. there’s absolutely nothing wrong with mine). Y’all, I was on a roll. Couldn’t stop myself. The criticism was flowing like running water. Sadly, it wasn’t until I got in the car that I realized what I had done. Ouch! Up until that moment, I never realized how much I criticized myself. And to do it in public was completely embarrassing! It’s one thing to do it at home (which is still wrong) and another to do it in public. As I sat in my car tearing up, I promised myself that I would never criticize myself in public again. I can only imagine the impression I left. Sigh

Here’s a full body picture from another day. I’m learning that the only way I can fully embrace myself, as well as become more confident, is to stop hiding what I consider flaws and imperfections. And the negative self talk has to go, TODAY! How can I promote self-love if I’m not truly embracing all of me?

For me, there’s something so cathartic about releasing issues into the atmosphere. Once out, I imagine the words braking into fragments until they become tiny particles floating away into the universe. Release & Breathe

Thank you for reading! Praying you have a wonderful week.

Shaun