My life. My world. Love, hope, peace, joy & happiness.
In a few months I’ll be 49. Y’all, so much has happened during this decade. I lost myself, found myself, then discovered what I thought I wanted for decades wasn’t really what I wanted. Yeah.. I’ll be 49 this year and I’m starting over – new dreams, new goals, new relationships. ~ Shaun
From volunteering to serve on a conference committee in the summer of 2020 – to connecting with the committee leader, Dawn Lieck – to saying “Yes” when asked to write a chapter in the Finally Free anthology – to the book launch and self promotion – to where I am today – it was all orchestrated by God long ago. Long before I began blogging. Long before I wrote my first journal entry. Y’all, God already had a plan. Isn’t He amazing!
A few days ago, I was searching though old jump drives for a picture and found one of my “progress” videos (I create videos to document my goals and progress). Well, this particular video was missing from the group of videos I have created and saved over the years. It was dated November 24, 2014 – wasn’t my first video but somehow it never made it to the folder with the rest. In this video, I talk about writing a book someday. Honestly, I don’t even remember ever thinking about actually writing a book. I know over the years people have told me that I should write a book, but in this video I said I would. Wow!
Lately, everyone’s been talking about manifesting their dreams. Well, I guess I have been manifesting mine all along. All while I have been watching God work in others’ lives and celebrating their successes, He’s been working in mine. Yes.. I’m tearing up. Y’all, I’m so humbled and grateful for everything God has done in my life and is currently doing. Most of the time it seems like life is just drifting by, but when I look back I realize so many wonderful things have happened and even more is happening. Y’all, I really do love life!
Before I end, I wanted to share my Facebook post from a year ago – January 21, 2021:
Sooooo grateful for Hootsuite and WONDERFUL family and friends! I haven’t eaten breakfast or lunch. Today of ALL days, I’m super busy. Thank you all for the support and making this day so special!! Digital copies are available TODAY ONLY for $1.99 through Amazon. (See link in original post.) If you would like an autographed copy, you can purchase it through my website- LaShaundreaB.com.
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE SHARES!!!🥰😭❤️
Y’all, I’m still not sure where this new chapter of life is taking me. At times it feels a little overwhelming because the ideas keep coming. Thankfully, I’m finally learning how to manage and prioritize them, but it’s still a lot.
The book experience gave me a glimpse of what true freedom looked like and what I was capable of doing. Now that I am finally free, I can’t go back to the way things used to be. Nope, I just can’t. Right now.. as I type.. I know God is writing. Yes, He’s either writing or editing my story. Smiling because I know God already knows I’m not going to stick to the script. Lol. I’m pretty sure He’s written several different versions to get me where I need to be. Y’all, I can’t wait to see how it all plays out. Again, I really do love life!
Anyhoo.. thanks for reading. Wishing you a wonderful Friday and fabulous weekend!
Shaun
Obedience. The definition of obedience is – an act or instance of obeying (following the command or guidance of).
As many of you know, I have been on this journey of completely allowing God to lead; to follow his guidance without wavering. Well.. just imagine how that’s going. Sigh
So, there is this little thing called free will, which is the ability to act at one’s discretion. Well, I’m finding free will isn’t always my friend. During this journey, free will has popped up numerous times and continues to pop up whenever – 1) I don’t believe God is moving fast enough or He’s moving way too fast; 2) I believe things are going in the wrong direction; or 3) whenever I flat out don’t want to follow His instruction. Y’all, sometimes free will is a pain and often delays blessings. Ugh!
Last night I was given specific instructions to leave a certain matter alone, to allow God to work so that I could see His glory. Y’all know I love watching God work! Well, that didn’t happen. I kept picking at it. Checking to see if progress was being made. Kind of like putting a bandage on a wound and removing it every couple of hours to see if it’s healing. Uhh.. It won’t if you don’t leave it alone. So, this morning I couldn’t help myself. I couldn’t leave things alone. I went in and started manipulating things. I was like, “God, I’m just gonna do this one little thing then give it back to You.” And that’s exactly what I did. And guess what, I feel like I have failed another challenge. Not in a shameful way, but in a way that has me regretting my decision. However, at the same time, I still have the desire to do better. I just have to know how things will turn out if I allow God to lead.
Okay.. y’all, I just had another “Aha” moment. Imagine going into a lab, starting an experiment and when the experiment isn’t moving along fast enough, you decide to manipulate the process. Guess what?! You just altered the outcome. You will never know what could’ve been had you left it alone.
Slowly but surely, I’m learning. If I am going to allow God to lead, I must be obedient. Period.
Thanks for reading! Hope you have a lovely Wednesday!
Shaun
Happy Hump Day! It’s Wednesday again. The second Wednesday of the year, to be exact.
Feeling some kind of way this morning because I am not really feeling anything at all. I don’t feel happy, sad, excited, mad, nothing. As my son would say, “Meh.” Not sure if that’s a feeling but that is exactly where I am.
Usually, by this time of the year, I have created a vision board, made a “progress” video (I make short progression videos at least twice a year where I talk about my goals and things I have accomplished- believe I only made one last year) and have written at least ten journal entries by now. Well, I have not done any of it. So far I only have three journal entries for this year. I know, I blog and make social media posts, but it’s not the same. Five years from now, I need to be able to find out what I was doing on a particular date and without it documented, I will never know. Maybe it’s not as important as I am making it out to be. Maybe I just woke up in my feelings, or with the lack of feelings. Nah.. I’m definitely feeling but unfortunately I don’t have a name for it.
This morning, while going through my Facebook memories, I found this gem, which is more than 30 years old. I shared on Facebook in 2016 with the following caption:
My 12th grade English teacher gave me this 20+ years ago. It inspired me then, and continues to inspire me today. 💗
Everyone in our class received cards from Ms. Tressin, but mine was special. Looking back, she saw something in me that I thought was hidden from the world. She knew I was a dreamer.
Maybe that’s what I am feeling this morning. I have imagined it. I have dreamed it. And yet, here I am thirty years later still chasing the dream. Or am I? Y’all, I believe I am having an “Aha” moment.
So… transparent moment… if you have been following me since last April, you know that I resigned from my job in pursuit of fulfilling my dreams. Well, over the months I have felt like a boat without an anchor, being tossed all over the place. When I resigned, I had no plan, no real direction about where I wanted to go. All I knew is, I was free! Hadn’t felt that free since I was in high school. I felt like I had the opportunity to begin again. However, I had too many years of education, degrees, and experience to just throw it all away. Plus everyone kept making suggestions about where I should be or could be heading. So, I felt compelled to continue along that path. Exactly like a high school senior! Wow!! Well, to be honest, every time I attempt to do it, I feel trapped. I know what to do to make it work. I have done it for years, but it is not where my heart lies. So far I have wasted money on trying to pursue things that would make me money but my heart has not been in anything I have done. Yeah.. it all sounded good but my heart kept screaming “NO!”
Here’s what I truly want at this moment in time, and what I wanted when I resigned. I want to be the best mom I can possibly be. I want to be able to spend as much time as I possibly can with my children. Right now I have no desire to pursue a career and be a mom. I just want to be a mom, create memories, share inspirational thoughts and spread love, kindness and hope throughout the world. Sounds pretty flower-childish, doesn’t it? Lol! But that’s what I want to do! And guess what?! It’s exactly what I have been blessed to do. I am living off of less than I have ever made and I’m okay. Question is, shouldn’t I want more?
Maybe I’m thinking too much this morning. This probably should have been a journal entry. Lol. But here it is, my first random rambling of the year. Not going to delete any of it. Just gonna publish and keep going. Everything will work out.
Hope you have a wonderful day!
Shaun
Yesterday, as my kids and I opened gifts, I could not help but smile as I realized I received what I wanted. No, it wasn’t a man. Smile. It was what I have always longed for, but until yesterday, had not been able to fully articulate. The one thing I have always wanted is to be loved the way I love. To be loved unconditionally. And yesterday I felt it. It’s not like my kids have not always loved me. However, I always felt incomplete because I believed I needed the love of a significant other. Shaking my head – those crazy, yet wonderful, fairytales. Smile. Well, yesterday, their love was enough. I felt complete. Ironically, I don’t need the love of a significant other to feel complete. I already have everything I need. Imagine that! Y’all, it feels like someone flipped a switch from incomplete to complete. Life is so funny. Advice – don’t bother trying to understand it. Believe me, you will never figure it out.
Oh.. one of my gifts was a new suitcase. I screamed like a little kid when I saw it. My kids know me oh so well. I guess they are preparing me for my next chapter. It’s almost like they are kicking me out the nest. All smiles. I’m ready!
Also, one of my sisters got engaged, yesterday!!! I am so excited for her! God is good!
Thanks for reading and please enjoy the rest of the holiday season!
Shaun
It’s Shaun’s World 
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