My life. My world. Love, hope, peace, joy & happiness.
Y’all, the struggle is real!
Do I choose what I want now?
Or…
Do I choose what I want most?
Will my choice make my 100-year-old self proud or look back with regrets?
Again, the struggle is real.
Life is real.
Only time will tell which I chose.
Shaun♥️
Good Morning☀️
The last few months have been an emotional roller coaster ride for me. However, these last two weeks have really done a number on me! Just being honest and transparent. Imagine spending your entire life picturing a future world where kindness, peace, love, inclusion, equity, and goodwill towards all humanity was the norm to… whatever this is. Y’all, I don’t even know what to call it. It’s like going from envisioning somewhat of a utopian world—if you know me, then you know I wanted the world singing in “perfect harmony” (smile)—to seeing a dystopian society being created right before my eyes.
This isn’t a movie. It’s real. So very real. Those hurting aren’t fictional characters. They are real people. Real people (not only “DEI” hires) are losing or in fear of losing their jobs. Real people—not only criminals but children and mothers—are being detained and deported without an ounce of empathy. Marginalized people who have spent their lives overcoming discrimination are being treated like they’re “second–class citizens.” Whew! Talk about triggering!! Then, to make matters even worse, access to vital information is being denied and/or erased. Again, this isn’t a movie, “fake news,” or “woke news.” This is actually happening!
I digress… (long sigh)
I know for my own sanity, I must let go of things I cannot change… at the moment. I know that I can’t help others if I’m not physically, mentally, or emotionally strong enough and prepared to do so. But y’all, I am so serious right now, my heart is breaking.💔
I found this among inspirational messages I have saved. A much needed word for today.🙏🏽
Thanks for allowing me to share. I know God’s in control. I pray you have a wonderful Sunday.♥️
Love you always,
Shaun
**Very random, but the sun is rising, and I would love to hear a rooster crow. I miss my grands and childhood summers.
Good Morning!☀️
How is everything going?
How have you been feeling lately?
Me? I’m so glad you asked.☺️
So, my new year started off on a high note. However, it went downhill soon after—like the next day—when I began thinking about my personal life. I thought about how I chose to be a mom first and built my life around my two—no disrespect to my babies because I would do it all again if I had to. It’s true.
Side note: If you don’t already know, I love being a mom. Y’all, I love everything about motherhood—the good and bad. Believe me, my adult children were regular kids like every other kid. They tested their boundaries and my patience, but I never once regretted having them. They were and truly are my blessings.
Anyhoo… Reality hit me hard a couple of days ago. I’m talking hard! For a minute, I felt completely lost and alone. Y’all, I am single—like, single, single—grown kids, no man single—and I’m 51.
That’s when I knew I needed a change of scenery to clear my mind, so I hit the road. I wasn’t about to sit and wallow in my thoughts of what I didn’t or don’t have. Yes, I am 51, but I refuse to believe my best days are behind me. That I missed out on God’s plans for my personal life because I chose to make my babies a priority.
This morning I came across a Facebook memory from a few years ago and was reminded that everything that happened in my life, happened the way and in the order that God planned. I may not understand it, but I accept it. I accept it, and I’m letting it go. I must let it go. I know God’s got me.
Well, that’s how I’ve been feeling lately. How about you?😅
Don’t forget, today is Self-Love Saturday! Remember to treat yourself a little extra special today.♥️
Love you,
Shaun
Good Morning!☀️
God is moving. He’s moving in a way I don’t always understand, but He’s moving.
I was reading a journal entry from this date a few years ago and found an excerpt attached from January 3, 2015. This basically sums up what I struggle with at times—both needing encouragement and motivation and people not thinking I do.
It just baffles me how people think I don’t have the same needs as everyone else. Like I’m some kind of superhuman or something. As I mentioned back then, I do and handle things like I do because I have to, not always out of choice. But they were both right, it’s made me who I am today. Not sure if that’s always a good thing though.
Anyhoo…
As I said, God is moving. It’s so ironic that I am seeing this today. Yesterday, I revived something (yeah…learning not to over share) I began in 2022. Seeing the snippet of those two conversations confirms I’m moving in the right direction.
Y’all, I’m so grateful and thankful for God’s love. I am truly blessed.🥰
This is all for now. I’m looking forward to spending time with my bonus mom today. She already has a lot planned (tasks) for us to do.🤦🏽♀️☺️ I pray you have a wonderful day.♥️
Love you,
Shaun
Good Morning☀️
It’s Self-love Saturday!
Two years ago, I wrote the following in one of my Wednesday Writings post—
“Progression is the name of the game, right? Smiling. Looking forward to meeting the woman I’m becoming.” – Wednesday Writings, November 30, 2022
That statement has me smiling a huge smile. Cheeks hurt because my smile is so big.
Y’all, I can see the woman I am becoming. I see her, and she’s emerging unafraid and unapologetically. Yes, I see her, and I love her.
Real talk, though. I am so glad I didn’t give up on myself and didn’t settle for things as they were. I can only imagine what my life would be like right now had I settled. I knew the path I was headed down, and it wasn’t a good one. At one point, it was one of suppression, depression, and hopelessness. I also think about my children’s lives and what they would be like today. I am so proud of myself for making decisions that helped me take my life back. Y’all, God is so good. As I have said many times before, I am beyond blessed.♥️
Shaun
Good Morning!☀️
First, I want to thank everyone who said a prayer for me yesterday. It wasn’t easy for me to share how I was feeling. I had actually shared a more detailed post hours earlier, then unpublished it soon afterwards. As I said in my previous post, I hate feeling vulnerable, and openly sharing that much of my life made me feel so. So, thank you for allowing me a space to share because I really needed it. At the time that I posted it, I was on my way from the airport to the hotel and was trying not to start bawling during the ride. However, trying to hold it in was short lived. As soon as I got to the front desk to check in, the tears started pouring out, and I was boohooing all over the place. Y’all, I was so embarrassed, but couldn’t stop. Everyone was hugging me. I mean everyone. Even people waiting in the lobby. I was a mess…
After I got to my room, I FaceTimed my daughter and the first words out of her mouth were, “You look terrible!” And I did! That was my first time seeing myself. Y’all, I had been crying the whole trip—on my to the airport, on the plane, during my layover. The tears just kept coming. The other part of her response was laughter (we tend to do this at the weirdest times). Baby she laughed! And I couldn’t help but laugh too because I looked horrible! She kept apologizing, but said she’d never seen me look so bad in my life. Like I was in some movie or something. Then we laughed even more. I had planned on going to the opening ceremony last night, but was advised by my daughter to sit it out. She was like you already look bad, the last thing you want to do is be crying all over the place. So, I took her advice—even though I really wanted to hear our opening speaker. Then, I went and got something to eat, took a shower, and got in bed.
Y’all, I love my hearts. My son said to let him know if I needed anything. As if he could do much from hundreds of miles away. But his heart was in the right place. When I tell you I am truly blessed.
I don’t know how today will go. I feel much better, now. However, the grief that I experienced yesterday was so unexpected. So, I can only pray that today will be a more pleasant day. Something did come to mind—which could’ve been a trigger—I was attending a conference when my brother died. I was at a state conference in the same city as his hospital. Had seen him the night before. He just kept saying he was tired. So tired. He had been in ICU over a week and they’d tried everything. By the way, he had MRSA, one of the worst staph infections you can get, and it had spread to his heart. We never figured out how he got it. The doctors wanted to try one more surgery to see if it would help or prolong his life. I remember calling my stepmom to tell her I was about to leave the conference to head back to the hospital and she told me not to rush because he was gone. That they were waiting on everyone to make it to the hospital to say our final goodbyes. So maybe I was subconsciously triggered by the conference and it being his birthday. When I tell you life be lifeing for real!
Well, I’m going to end here. Going to turn over and get a few more hours of sleep before I start my day. Can’t wait to mingle, network and enjoy the free food samples. Outside of the National Restaurant Association Show (it’s huge!), our conference has some of the best food vendors. Met one yesterday while waiting for my food. Can’t wait to stop by their booth.☺️
As always, thank you so much for reading. Hopefully what I’ve written makes sense, if not it’s okay. I just needed to write. Now, I need to go back to sleep. However, before I do, I’ll end with this Facebook memory, which is very timely. Can’t make this stuff up!
Facebook Memory: October 6, 2023
You better live! Life isn’t slowing down or waiting for you to catch up. Stop putting everyone else first like they’re more important than you. Listen… and hear me good… No one is more important or more valuable than you are. No one! You’re not being selfish, self-centered or inconsiderate. Nah… You’re just recognizing your worth. Now it’s time you start living in it. Love you!♥️
Have a blessed Sunday!♥️
Love you,
Shaun
It’s Shaun’s World 
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