I am going to jump right in. So, a situation has developed over the past few days. My neighbor has been tying his dog to a tree outside my bedroom window… on my property!
When I heard the dog barking on Friday, I went outside to see what was going on. It seemed as if the dog had encircled the tree and somehow became entangled. The poor thing was barking uncontrollably. I considered knocking on my neighbor’s door and asking him to come get his dog, but decided it was not worth the trouble. I wrote it off as a one time thing because it had never happened before. I know he has a newborn baby. So maybe the barking was too much and he decided to put the dog outside. But why on my property?
That was Friday. Yesterday afternoon, he did the same thing! First of all, he never untangled the leash from around the tree. He just put the dog back on the leash and added a bowl of water. Umm.. now it seems like he is trying to make this thing permanent. Guess I should have addressed it Friday.
Honestly, I kind of feel sorry for the dog. Friday was the first time I saw the poor thing. He looked all old and worn. If you have ever watched The Dukes of Hazard, he looks exactly like Roscoe’s dog, Flash. Just sitting here shaking my head thinking about Flash and my current situation. Y’all, I really wanted a basset hound when I was a little girl. Now, 40 years later, I have one tied to my tree. Hilarious! My life…
Anyway, if this continues, I am going to have to address the situation. I’m just trying to figure out what to sayand how to say it. I have heard this guy talk to his son and the dog aggressively. So I have to be careful how I handle this. Especially with people being killed over the simplest things, nowadays.
Just thinking.. Maybe my tree is Flash’s (yes, I named him- Lol) little refuge. I just wish he would not bark so much. UGH!
It is Sunday, again! I hope you have something AMAZING planned. I am having brunch with my son this morning. Guess I forgot to tell y’all that he is finally back from his summer vacation. I missed him so much. Honestly, it is nice having someone to laugh with, again. Laughing alone is sad, but also entertaining at the same time. I often found myself laughing at myself. Life… Anyway, I do have to confess, the empty nest life is not so bad. Kinda looking forward to it. Lol. But for now, it really is good having him back home, and I am going to cherish every moment God has granted us together.
Okay… y’all enjoy your Sunday! Hope yours is as sunny and delightful as mine.
Yes, it is Sunday again! Seems like time is passing at warp speed (Star Trek- lol). I would love for it to slow down a little. I need time to process a few things.
Woke up thinking about the turn of events over the past month or so– personally as well as professionally. Even though I have been blogging since 2018, it was not until May of this year that I was ready to share my blogs with the world. In May, I also started volunteering again. It had been ages since I last volunteered. And, when I woke up this morning, I logged onto my professional social media accounts and began updating them. Also, this morning, it finally dawned on me why I had neglected those accounts for so long. Y’all, I did not want to be that person anymore.
Okay… moment of full transparency.
It all began two years ago. Whew, I never thought I would talk about this. At the beginning of 2018, I was asked to do a presentation for an association that was having a conference in Mississippi. I was so honored and hyped about it. I was given a topic, asked to come up with a few objectives for continuing education credits, and told I would be working with a local chef on a menu and food demonstration. Y’all, it was like a dream come true! It was everything I imagined I would be doing at this point in my career. I was ready!
The first hit I took was when I found out the association I was presenting for was not a diverse association but a national, all-Black association. Some would say I should have been honored. However, it was like receiving a blow to the heart. You see, I was asked by a predominately (99%) white company to deliver the presentation.
Just to give you some background on my relationship with this company. For several years, I had been invited to attend their sponsored events. At that time, I knew the state and regional directors well enough to contact them personally whenever I needed a sponsor for one of my events, educational materials for health fairs, or incentives for community projects. So when asked to give this presentation, I automatically assumed it was because they valued our relationship, not because they needed a Black registered dietitian to present to an all Black audience. That stung!
The second thing that happened was they changed my entire presentation. I was initially told they wanted the session to be fun and interactive. Which was right up my alley. I hate boring presentations! Well, after submitting my presentation for review, it was returned to me butchered. Y’all, the entire flow was all wrong. They kept the objectives but added random information. Even the fonts were inconsistent. They also added pictures that did not go with the text. Now, I might write crazy things in my blogs, and make all kinds of grammatical errors, but when it comes to my professional work, it has to be almost perfect before I present it. Honestly, I felt like my work had been sabotaged. Y’all, I cried.
The third thing that happened, and what finally made me question if I even wanted to be in that space anymore, happened during the night of the event. As I said– FULL transparency. This was a month and a half before my hysterectomy. My cycle had just started. Which meant I was extra irritated, cramping like crazy, and blood was pouring out of me. I wore a navy blue suit, and put on an adult diaper lined with two overnight pads, to hide or prevent any accidents. Y’all, I did not want anything going wrong. Well, I arrived at the venue and EVERYTHING was white. I mean— EVERYTHING! The floors were white. The linens were white. And ALL of the chairs were white– white cushioned chairs, that is. Talk about anxiety!! All I could do was pray– “Lord, please don’t let me have an accident on all of this white.” I kept thinking, what would I do if I stained one of the chairs? I tried to remain calm, but I was all nerves. So when I got up to present, no matter how professional I tried to be, it did not happen. Here is how the night went.
When my audience arrived, they were tired from attending hours of educational sessions. I was later informed that they thought my presentation was supposed to be entertaining. HA…so did I! Y’all, they had access to an open bar, and boy did they drink. Some, a lot more than others. Needless to say, I was giving a presentation to a room full of tired, tipsy people. As I said, my presentation had been changed. What I did not mention is that I had only received the revisions a day or two before the event. Which was not ample time to thoroughly review the changes, so I felt unprepared. I also did not have a microphone so I had to walk the room so that everyone could hear me. Funny story- There was this elderly lady that kept yelling, “I can’t hear you!” The night was a mess. When I tell you this crowd asked questions I had “zero” answers to! LOL! Funny, but sooo not funny. Y’all, I felt like a failure. Most of the night I deferred the questions to our host, the one who revised the presentation. At one point I stopped presenting because a few people would not stop talking. Y’all, one thing I hate is rudeness. And when the entire audience can hear your conversation, you, my friend, are being rude. So I stood there and glared at them until they stopped talking. Was I unprofessional…HECK YES! Y’all, I was fed up, I was sick, and I felt humiliated. I felt like an imposter– WOW! I just pinpointed when I began feeling like an imposter.
After that night, I swore I would never attend another one of their company’s events. That was also the last time I really posted anything of worth on my professional pages. I went into my shell and never wanted to come out. Honestly, I had given up. I had lost my confidence. That was two years ago.
As I mentioned, May was my turning point. Slowly, I am regaining my confidence. Maybe I did need two years to Reflect, Regroup, Refocus, and Rebuild. I do believe I am wiser and better prepared to handle the unexpected. I am also working on the way I deal with my imperfections. Recently, I attended a Zoom call with a lot of unknown attendees. At first, I was not going to turn on the camera. You know, leave the nice, edited picture displayed. At the last minute I was like, why not! I did not have on makeup. I had on a t-shirt and my hair held back with a headband. And my lighting was bad. But, I decided to show the world me. Part of my personal and professional growth is about me becoming comfortable with my imperfections. Slowly, but surely, I am growing.
Y’all, I am so grateful God loves me. Moving forward.
I believe Frederick Douglass’ descendants reading his “Fourth of July” speech is just as powerful as the speech itself. It is up to us to continue the difficult conversations surrounding racial issues, even on Independence Day.
Honestly, I considered not sharing this video. I did not want to interrupt the happy celebrations. But are the celebrations truly joyous? Because after the fireworks, BBQs, SAFE social gatherings, and “Happy 4th of July” pictures and posts, racial inequality remains. I mean.. only a few days ago Mississippi finally removed its racially divisive flag— in 2020!! What year did the United States gain its independence? Umm..1776. What year was slavery abolished in the United States? Supposedly 1865. And what year is this, again? Hmm.. 2020 in the 21st century.
Y’all, we cannot continue to pretend everything is okay, because IT IS NOT. Change is happening NOW, and WE must keep up the momentum. We cannot sit back and wait for another great leader to come along and tell us what to do. They have already done that. They have already equipped us with everything we need. Now it is our time to follow through. Not tomorrow or next month, but NOW!
Who’s with me?!
P.S. Be sure to watch the commentary at the end of the video. POWERFUL‼️ #HappyFourthOfJuly
I’m in my feelings right now. What do parents do when their children leave home? I thought I would be okay, but evidently I am not. I have always wanted my children to be independent. I do not believe in kids staying at home and leeching off their parents. I will help, but I refuse to be their caretaker for the rest of my life. Anyway.. I am not an empty nester just yet, but the time is quickly approaching. My son will be a junior in high school and he has already become so independent. Between spending time at his dad’s and with his cousins, he is only home a couple of weeks before he’s gone again. This time he was home for two days, now he’s off living his best life, again. Don’t worry, he’s not out hanging with a bunch of people. He’s hunkered down with family who are taking proper COVID-19 precautions. Anyway, here I am at home trying to adjust to being alone. I always said once my two left I would do this and do that. Well, I guess that was a lie. Did y’all hear Maury? I did! Lol. Maybe if I could travel freely, things would be different, but I’m not sure if they would. I am not going to complain too much. At least God has granted me a couple of more year to adjust. I guess I will consider this my transition period.
Anyhoo… just felt like sharing. Does anyone have any advice? Over the past month, I have signed up to volunteer for different events and serve on a couple of committees. So I will definitely be busy. I guess I’m missing him so badly because he just left a few hours ago. I am pretty sure I will be better tomorrow. Lol
Don’t feel like editing, so it is what it is. Thanks for reading.
It is not even 6:30 a.m. on a Saturday morning and I am wide awake. Actually, I have been up for a couple of hours, now. Today I was supposed to go to Mobile to continue my birthday celebration with my sisters. They had a day full of wonderful COVID-19-safe events planned. Unfortunately, the celebration must be postponed.
You see.. yesterday I began feeling sick. More than likely it is sinus issues, but I do not want to chance it. The day before yesterday, Mississippi had a spike in new COVID-19 cases. Y’all, over a 1,000 new cases were reported in one day. Yesterday there were half as many. As much as I want to celebrate with my sisters, I have to stay safe and make sure they remain safe, also. Y’all, this virus is something serious!
Right now I am having an early morning jam session. Zhané’sVibeis currently playing.
Oh… before I go, we did decide to have a video call later today. So the celebration will continue, just not in person.
Yesterday was so AMAZING! I laughed.. and danced.. and sang.. and ate.. took selfies.. and danced some more. Yesterday I let loose! As the old people used to say, I cut a rug!! LOL! I had no worries or complaints, ONLY laughter and love. Yesterday, I was me– authentically ME!
Before I end, I have to give a shout out to my two. Y’all, I know I say it all of the time, but I truly have the BEST children in the world. They know me so well! They embrace my quirkiness, which allows me to be free. I am so blessed to have children who love ALL of me.
Here are a few pictures from yesterday. Y’all, they made me a selfie wall. Lol. For those who know me, know I am the worst photographer but I LOVE taking pictures, especially selfies.
My babies and I celebrating my 47th birthday. Selfies!
Please allow me to interrupt my usual “Hello Sunday” blog with a tribute to my father. I must say, it is truly an honor and blessing to spend Father’s Day with my dad. After suffering from two strokes over the past two years, I did not think he would still be with us. Y’all, God is so good!
A few years ago, I had the opportunity to get to know my father better. To get to know the man behind “Mr. Sutton.” For as far back as I can remember, all my dad has ever done is work. He was a teacher (now retired teacher), a truck driver, the snowball man, the fireworks man, the Valentine’s Day man, the tombstone man, and now the graveyard man. Yes.. my father has a tombstone and graveyard business. Y’all, he is always working.
On Father’s Day 2016, I interrupted his work schedule. That morning I informed him that I was going to work with him. He was not thrilled to hear it, but allowed me go anyway. Y’all, I was a grown woman going to work with my daddy. Lol! And you best believe he put me to work. He does not believe in people just sitting around talking and watching. If you are with him, you better be prepared to work or be prepared to leave.
Here is what I wrote and posted on Facebook the following year:
It’s amazing how you think you know someone, but in reality you only see what’s on the surface. Last Father’s Day, I discovered so much about my dad. After we made snowball juice and bagged ice, we had a long conversation about dreams and goals.
Throughout the years, we’ve had conversations about his childhood and people, but never about his dreams. After showing me the picture below (the prototype for his first snowball business), he tells me that he never thought he’d go to college. He stuttered constantly and had dyslexia (back then they didn’t know what it was). He was able to go to college on a track scholarship (yes- my daddy could run!). He said he studied so hard to make it through college; while selling snacks from his dorm room (what can I say, it’s in his blood 😁). One of his most prized possessions is his thesis. He said he worked his butt off to complete it.
Prototype for Sutton Rolling Store 1978. He said all he had was a bike and a dream. On that day, he also showed me the concept behind his tombstone/monument business.
He ended our conversation by telling me to go after what I want in life. He told me to never give up on my dreams no matter how impossible they may seem or who doubts me. He said people will laugh, but keep trusting God. It may take years, but it’ll come to pass. NEVER give up!
On that day, he gave me the boost I needed to pursue all of my dreams. So, if you see me reaching for other galaxies, you know where I got it from. Yes- I’m my father’s child. Happy Father’s Day, Alton Sutton!
Y’all, I love my Daddy! I cannot wait to spend today with him.
Character: the mental or moral qualities distinctive to an individual
Over the past week, or anytime something major happens, and I do not respond or react the way others do, I begin to question myself. Like– Am I not normal? Is there something wrong with me? Why am I not visibly outraged like everyone else? I care. I feel. I am angry. I am disgusted and disappointed and frustrated. I am all of these things. Yet, people may never know it because I do not show it. Why? Hmm… It finally dawned on me that I am not that person. That is not who I am. So why force myself to respond like others if it does not come naturally. Y’all, it is not my character.
I can think of so many incidents throughout my life where people have told me how they would have reacted differently to the same situations. For example– just because I feel like writing– when I was in my early twenties, I had gotten off work early and stopped by my boyfriends place to surprise him. Little did I know, I was the one in for a surprise. I found him in bed with another girl. I stood beside the bed and causally asked them a few questions, like- “What are y’all doing?” “Why didn’t you lock the door?” You know, questions anyone would ask. After receiving my answers, I sat down and waited for her to leave. Y’all, I remember this big brass lamp being on the nightstand. For a second, I considered bashing his head in. Yep… I could visualize the entire scene. However, I chose to remain calm. Even our conversation afterwards was calm. He kept saying things like, “I know you want to hit me,” and “Just let me have it!” If “Boy, bye” was a phrase back then, I would have definitely used it. Every time I tell someone this story, they tell me that they would have responded differently. Most say they would have fought him and the girl. But why?? Was I hurt? YES!! I thought I was in love with him. But, the consequences that would have resulted from that moment of gratification, would have been costly.
Now, have I ever acted out of character before? HA!! Of course! When I was ACTING! Whenever I have to give people what they expect, it is called acting. And y’all, I hate acting. Whenever I have to cuss to get my point across, that.. my friend.. is acting. You see, whenever I am hurt or angry, I become very quiet. I do not say much. I just act. Y’all, this is my character.
I decided to write this because it is something that has been weighing on me for a while, even before George Floyd’s murder. As I said, after something major happens, whether national or personal, my response is always a little different from others. Hence, the reason I always refer to myself as being unique or quirky. The way I react or respond may not be what is typically expected. Y’all, I was going through a crazy divorce for over four years and I rarely said a word about it or spoke badly about my ex. There were so many things I could have said or done, but chose not to. Shoot.. I can barely cuss when writing, because again, it is justnot in me.
Today, I am so grateful for those who choose to accept me for who I am. Those who understand and respect my true (not the act) character, as I do theirs. From this day forward, I will no longer question myself based on how others think I should react or respond. Y’all, people will have you angry with yourself only to come around and agree with you later. Honestly, in the end, the only opinion that matters is God’s.
This picture only represents a snippet of the relationship I have with my friend, T. Only using her initial because she does not like people in her business. Believe me, I am not crazy! Anyhoo… T and I met in culinary school 20 years ago. Yes, in 2000. Honestly, I do not know how we became friends. She was a comic book collector and loved Fred G. Sanford, Redd Foxx’s character on Sanford & Son. Y’all, Fred was hilarious! So, when I think about it, maybe it was her references to Fred that drew me to her. I mean, not a day went by that she did not say, “You know what Fred would say.” That was 20 years ago. To this day, Fred always ends up in our conversations. ALWAYS!
As with my other friends, I believe our friendship has lasted because we give each other space; or, maybe it is because they give me space. Hmmm…something to think about. Anyway, most people would not believe that T and I live 20 minutes from each other and only physically see each other once a year. Sometimes it is longer than that. We keep in touch through texts. Y’all, I am so happy texting was invented. For real! However, unlike my other friends, T texts me daily. Every morning she texts me a scripture from the Bible, and sometimes she includes inspirational messages. Now, I am not going to lie, I am not that consistent. I might text her something once or twice a week. But she ALWAYS sends me something inspirational, daily.
This morning, she sent the text in the picture along with a scripture. When God placed us together 20 years ago, He knew we would still be friends today. Forever grateful to have her in my life.
It’s Shaun’s World 
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