This quote was amongst my Facebook memories from seven years ago – February 16, 2022. Y’all, chills literally ran through me as I read this quote. It made me stop and ask myself what am I repeating? What have I not repaired? What behaviors am I repeating that are preventing me from moving forward?
Hmm… That’s about all I’m going to write today. If this quote has you as shaken as it has me, maybe you should do what I’m going to do, disconnect and truly think about the things I haven’t repaired. You know, the things we say we have repaired but have actually been avoiding because confrontation only brings pain. Yeah.. it’s time to do a little soul searching because life is too precious and too short to continue repeating the same cycle.
Thanks for reading and have a wonderful Wednesday!
Before I forget, Happy Galatine’s Day to all of my Gal Pals! You are loved and forever appreciated.💘🌹
Y’all, life is good and God is awesome! Came across the following post in my Facebook memories from a year ago. Basically, it sums up how I’ve felt over this past year.
Facebook Memory: February 13, 2021
January was pretty awesome! What a way to start the year. Listen, I’m still amazed! I believe God just loves loving on me in public sometimes.☺️🥰
Y’all, never did I imagine I would be an author. I love blogging and journaling, but I never pictured seeing my name in a book. Never!! Well, besides my thesis, which I still need to have bound.🤦🏽♀️
Seriously, last month I stepped outside of my comfort zone and did something else I never imagined myself doing– I promoted myself. I promoted my work. It’s one thing to do it here, among family and friends, but completely different doing it among peers and strangers. First, there’s the fear of being noticed. Then, there’s the fear of being imperfect. Yeah.. over the years I’ve allowed those two things to keep me from moving forward. Well, today I can happily say, writing, promoting and launching the book gave me the confidence I needed to step into the next dimension of my purpose. Believe me, the fear is still here. However, it’s not stopping me from moving forward because there’s so much God has for me to do.
Also, I want to thank everyone for your support. I truly couldn’t have done this without you. I appreciate you giving me the space to be me. Thank you!🙏🏽❤️
That was the beginning. Since then, I have launched LaShaundreaB, LLC, createdShaun’s Daily Inspiration and expanded It’s Shaun’s World to include my love for food, travel and fun (follow me on Instagram and TikTok). As I stated earlier, I never knew being part of the book anthology (Finally Free) would give me the confidence I needed to step into the next dimension of my purpose. Never once did I imagine I needed that boost. Honestly, I thought I was good where I was. Although I’m not completely out of my shell, and sometimes still retreat to my comfort zone, I’m on a totally different level than I’ve ever been and ready to go higher. God is good!
If you would like to follow my journey, you can find me on TikTok (2 accounts):
In a few months I’ll be 49. Y’all, so much has happened during this decade. I lost myself, found myself, then discovered what I thought I wanted for decades wasn’t really what I wanted. Yeah.. I’ll be 49 this year and I’m starting over – new dreams, new goals, new relationships. ~ Shaun
Today I would like to share some of my thoughts and feelings about where I’m at in this stage of life. Basically, I just need to write.
This morning I came across another Facebook memory I shared two years ago. Here’s the quote:
Never allow waiting to become a habit. Live your dreams and take risks. Life is happening now.
Author Unknown
Back then I was like, “Yeah! I’m not waiting for nothing or no one. I’m living my best life now!” Fast forward to today, this quote has me feeling some kind of way. Let me explain.
Transparent moment:
For a while now.. I guess you can say for months now.. I’ve been second and triple guessing my feelings. Even after a few sessions of therapy, my therapist says I’m fine. So why don’t I feel fine?
Here’s what I’m feeling or have been feeling, and as strange as it may sound it kind of frightens me – calm, peaceful, relaxed, happy, and loved. Everything I’ve ever dreamed of andit frightens me. Sounds strange, doesn’t it? Like why does it frighten me so?
Okay.. back to the quote. When I shared it two years ago, I remember feeling like I really needed to enjoy the space I was in, needed to be more present. I remember constantly waiting for things to happen or trying to make things happen. I spent so much time doing both that I was only living my life in spurts and was always anxious. Now here I am two years later, very present and living in the moment, living the dream.
So why am I so perplexed about where I am in life?
Well, since I was a teenager I have always said, and lived by this – “After I turn 50, I’m going to live my dream.” You see, the first 50 years were supposed to be my test and trial period. My period to make mistakes as well as make the amount of money needed to support and sustain my lifestyle for the next 50 years. And the next 50 were to be spent doing what I actually loved, which kind resembles what I’m doing now but without the millions of dollars I imagined. Yep.. I’ve had it all planned out for decades. Yeah.. planned. I have to laugh because according to my plan and timeline, I’m supposed to be working my butt off trying to figure out how I’m going to live and sustain my dream and I’m here living nonchalantly like 50 isn’t fast approaching. Guess you could say I’m still in the test and trial period so why am I worried. Well, I’ll be 49 this year and time is running out!
Side Note – As I was writing, God reminded me of what I asked for. Last March, as I was sitting at my desk working my butt off, I looked out the window and saw this bird singing. At that moment, I told God I wanted to live as free as a bird, and as clear as day He told me I could. Three weeks later I resigned from my job. Ever since I’ve been living this carefree, basically, euphoric life. He gave me exactly what I asked for but for some reason I keep trying to find fault in it. Maybe, I don’t have to work my butt off trying to figure out how I’m going to support my dream. Maybe all I need to do is leave it in God’s hands while enjoy life.
Note – After I write this blog, I’m going to leave this matter alone because I get the feeling that I’m disrespecting God’s gift every time I bring this up.
Y’all, I’m feeling much better now that I got that all out. Life is really good. Just had another “Aha!” moment. Have I been subconsciously searching for ways to self-sabotage my dream? Would I do that to myself? Hmm.. Something to really think about.
Anyhoo.. thanks for reading and following my random thoughts. Sometimes I just need to get it all out into the universe. I’m so grateful for this space. God is so amazing!
From volunteering to serve on a conference committee in the summer of 2020 – to connecting with the committee leader, Dawn Lieck – to saying “Yes” when asked to write a chapter in the Finally Free anthology – to the book launch and self promotion – to where I am today – it was all orchestrated by God long ago. Long before I began blogging. Long before I wrote my first journal entry. Y’all, God already had a plan. Isn’t He amazing!
A few days ago, I was searching though old jump drives for a picture and found one of my “progress” videos (I create videos to document my goals and progress). Well, this particular video was missing from the group of videos I have created and saved over the years. It was dated November 24, 2014 – wasn’t my first video but somehow it never made it to the folder with the rest. In this video, I talk about writing a book someday. Honestly, I don’t even remember ever thinking about actually writing a book. I know over the years people have told me that I should write a book, but in this video I said I would. Wow!
Lately, everyone’s been talking about manifesting their dreams. Well, I guess I have been manifesting mine all along. All while I have been watching God work in others’ lives and celebrating their successes, He’s been working in mine. Yes.. I’m tearing up. Y’all, I’m so humbled and grateful for everything God has done in my life and is currently doing. Most of the time it seems like life is just drifting by, but when I look back I realize so many wonderful things have happened and even more is happening. Y’all, I really do love life!
Before I end, I wanted to share my Facebook post from a year ago – January 21, 2021:
Sooooo grateful for Hootsuite and WONDERFUL family and friends! I haven’t eaten breakfast or lunch. Today of ALL days, I’m super busy. Thank you all for the support and making this day so special!! Digital copies are available TODAY ONLY for $1.99 through Amazon. (See link in original post.) If you would like an autographed copy, you can purchase it through my website- LaShaundreaB.com.
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE SHARES!!!🥰😭❤️
Y’all, I’m still not sure where this new chapter of life is taking me. At times it feels a little overwhelming because the ideas keep coming. Thankfully, I’m finally learning how to manage and prioritize them, but it’s still a lot.
The book experience gave me a glimpse of what true freedom looked like and what I was capable of doing. Now that I am finally free, I can’t go back to the way things used to be. Nope, I just can’t. Right now.. as I type.. I know God is writing. Yes, He’s either writing or editing my story. Smiling because I know God already knows I’m not going to stick to the script. Lol. I’m pretty sure He’s written several different versions to get me where I need to be. Y’all, I can’t wait to see how it all plays out. Again, I really do love life!
Anyhoo.. thanks for reading. Wishing you a wonderful Friday and fabulous weekend!
Obedience. The definition of obedience is – an act or instance of obeying (following the command or guidance of).
As many of you know, I have been on this journey of completely allowing God to lead; to follow his guidance without wavering. Well.. just imagine how that’s going. Sigh
So, there is this little thing called free will, which is the ability to act at one’s discretion. Well, I’m finding free will isn’t always my friend. During this journey, free will has popped up numerous times and continues to pop up whenever – 1) I don’t believe God is moving fast enough or He’s moving way too fast; 2) I believe things are going in the wrong direction; or 3) whenever I flat out don’t want to follow His instruction. Y’all, sometimes free will is a pain and often delays blessings. Ugh!
Last night I was given specific instructions to leave a certain matter alone, to allow God to work so that I could see His glory. Y’all know I love watching God work! Well, that didn’t happen. I kept picking at it. Checking to see if progress was being made. Kind of like putting a bandage on a wound and removing it every couple of hours to see if it’s healing. Uhh.. It won’t if you don’t leave it alone. So, this morning I couldn’t help myself. I couldn’t leave things alone. I went in and started manipulating things. I was like, “God, I’m just gonna do this one little thing then give it back to You.” And that’s exactly what I did. And guess what, I feel like I have failed another challenge. Not in a shameful way, but in a way that has me regretting my decision. However, at the same time, I still have the desire to do better. I just have to know how things will turn out if I allow God to lead.
Okay.. y’all, I just had another “Aha” moment. Imagine going into a lab, starting an experiment and when the experiment isn’t moving along fast enough, you decide to manipulate the process. Guess what?! You just altered the outcome. You will never know what could’ve been had you left it alone.
Slowly but surely, I’m learning. If I am going to allow God to lead, I must be obedient. Period.
Thanks for reading! Hope you have a lovely Wednesday!
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