Life

Premature Empty Nest Syndrome

I’m in my feelings right now. What do parents do when their children leave home? I thought I would be okay, but evidently I am not. I have always wanted my children to be independent. I do not believe in kids staying at home and leeching off their parents. I will help, but I refuse to be their caretaker for the rest of my life. Anyway.. I am not an empty nester just yet, but the time is quickly approaching. My son will be a junior in high school and he has already become so independent. Between spending time at his dad’s and with his cousins, he is only home a couple of weeks before he’s gone again. This time he was home for two days, now he’s off living his best life, again. Don’t worry, he’s not out hanging with a bunch of people. He’s hunkered down with family who are taking proper COVID-19 precautions. Anyway, here I am at home trying to adjust to being alone. I always said once my two left I would do this and do that. Well, I guess that was a lie. Did y’all hear Maury? I did! Lol. Maybe if I could travel freely, things would be different, but I’m not sure if they would. I am not going to complain too much. At least God has granted me a couple of more year to adjust. I guess I will consider this my transition period.

Anyhoo… just felt like sharing. Does anyone have any advice? Over the past month, I have signed up to volunteer for different events and serve on a couple of committees. So I will definitely be busy. I guess I’m missing him so badly because he just left a few hours ago. I am pretty sure I will be better tomorrow. Lol

Don’t feel like editing, so it is what it is. Thanks for reading.

Enjoy your weekend!

Shaun

Life

God’s Favor

Sitting here reminiscing about events that took place in the Summer of 2014. Y’all, so many wonderful things happened that that year. Like the memory I am about to share.

One day, out of the blue, I received an invitation to attend a culinary media training event in New Orleans. It was an all-expenses paid trip. All I had to do was show up. At first, I was hesitant about going because I was afraid. I was afraid that I would not live up to what was expected of me. I was afraid that I would make mistakes. I was afraid I would not fit in. I was afraid of where it could possibly lead me. I was afraid of the potential– my potential. Then, I remembered God’s favor. He would not have presented the opportunity if He believed I could not handle it. I mean, EVERYTHING was paid for. All I had to do was go. So, I went. Here is what I wrote afterwards:

New Orleans was definitely a great professional experience. I came back with a sense of worth. I felt like I could actually accomplish my goals. I now have a different outlook on life & my role in this universe. I am destined for greatness & there’s nothing wrong with it. Thank you God for helping me realize my potential. Please give me the knowledge, strength, courage, and intelligence to do things the correct way. I thank you so much for the favor!

Shaun’s Journal: June 2014

Can’t you hear Donald Lawrence and the Tri-City Singers singing, God’s Favor? I can! The song says, “God’s favor is more precious than life.”

Favor.

Shaun

Life

Can I SCREAM, Now?!

Scream: To give a long, loud, piercing cry or cries, expressing excitement, great emotion, or PAIN

I say that I want to scream, but I believe I need to scream. I am so frustrated, right now. Honestly, I have been frustrated– BEYOND frustrated– since my brother passed. People have said that I need to give myself time to process his death. HA! Easier said than done.

But to be completely transparent, yeah.. because who am I kidding, that whole divorce thing did a number on me. After my divorce was final, I thought I was finally free and about to live my best life. My birthday theme was “46 & FREE!” I was posting, “New beginnings” all over the place. Then three months later, my brother died, unexpectedly. Y’all, what a blow! We were supposed to be together until we were old and grey. But God had other plans. Now, here we are in the lovely year of 2020. Speechless.

Y’all, can I SCREAM, now???

The only visual I can give you of how I am feeling, and what I want to do… correction… what I NEED to do, comes from Michael and Janet Jackson’s video Scream. Soooo…

Shaun

Uncategorized

Praying . . .

Today is June 1, 2020. It is the first day of my birthday month. Although my birthday falls towards the end of the month, I am usually celebrating right now. Everyone who knows me knows I love my birthdays! Y’all, right now I should be happily planning my celebration and counting down the days; however, I am not. This year, for the first time since I was a little girl, I am not excited. Do not get me wrong, I am grateful.. very grateful, but not excited.

Honestly, how can I celebrate while our county is in turmoil? We are outraged about the murders of our black men and women by the hands of those who swore to protect and serve our citizens. We are angry about injustices black and brown people face daily due to systemic, overt, and subtle racism. We are angry because we are angry! Believe me, this is not the country our forefathers imagined. They would be devastated to know that we are still fighting for civil rights in 2020. When will it end?

So, this year, instead of spending time planning my celebration, I am going to spend it praying for our nation. Yes, I believe in the power of prayer because GOD is still in control. My prayer is that God places His arms of protection around our families, friends, and neighbors. That He breaks down ALL negative barriers to include hatred, racism, anger, and divisiveness; and that He unites our nation through love and peace. Y’all, I truly believe, with my whole heart and soul, that love conquers all. I am not saying that bad things will not happen or evil will never exist. However, I do believe that there is more good in this world, than bad. I refuse to believe otherwise. Praying. . .

Shaun

Uncategorized

This Too Will Pass

I needed to write. Writing helps me process my feelings, especially when I am sad, confused or angry. Up until this point, I have not written anything about George Floyd’s murder, or any of the aftermath. Not even in my journal. Which is pretty odd. I keep telling myself I need to document this. But I have not been able to write. I guess it is because I cannot log off social media. I go from Twitter to Facebook to Instagram, then back to Twitter. The stories are so overwhelming, yet so mesmerizing. It is like I am here, but not here. I need to get a grip.

In the midst of all of my thoughts this morning, a song came to mind. A song that I used to listen to as a childThis Too Will Pass, by the late Reverend James Cleveland. The song says:

I’ve had heartaches like this before, and I’ve had disappointments by the score. I claim the victory at last. This too will pass. The sun will shine, it can’t rain all the time. The clouds are gray, will soon have to pass away.

Guess what– this too will pass. God is working. Brighter days are coming. Be blessed!

Shaun